I AM NOT A RACIST, I AM SIMPLY A LOVER OF BLACK MUSIC

Let me just get something off my chest before everyone goes accusing me being a racist - I AM NOT A RACIST~! I LOVE BLACK PEOPLE AND I LOVE BLACK MUSIC!!! JUST BECAUSE I TELL AN AFRICAN AMERICAN THAT THEY'RE GOING TO WIN THIS THING IN SPADES, ALL IT MEANS IS THAT I THINK THEY'RE GOING TO WIN THIS COMPETITION! DON'T READ INTO MY ALLEGED RACISM!!!!

You can check out the video of my alleged racism right here!!!

***ANGRY CAPS LOCK OFF***

Okay, well that was nice! LOL. What a competition last night. I'm sure everyone is talking about Sanjaya's Hair Style. It was BEAUTIFUL. IF THERe's one thing you have to do to win American Idol it's TAKE CHANCES! FREE YOURSELF!!! FREE YOUR MIND!!!! LOVE IT OR LOSE IT!!!

Sanjaya might be a little queer, but he's a great talent and HE'S EXCITING EVERY WEEK!!!!

You know what, I've been getting some flack this year about being a little too mean to the contestants. They say I'm more opinionated than previous years. They say I have m ore to say this year. They're saying I'm acting less drunk, less out of it.

People, I just want to say thank you!!!!!!!!!! YOU DON'T KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO BE A roll model for people!!!! and you don't know how hard it is to stay off pills during the taping of a live show -- BUT IF THAT'S WHAT I HVE TO DO, THAT'S WHAT I HAVE TO DO!!!

Can we just talk Idol for a second? WHO WILL GET KICKED OFF TONIGHT?????

Haley? Her performance was a little boring last night, but this girl sure knows how to show off her bootie? You should have seen Randy's boner next to me -- i though he's poke Ryan in the eye it was so big!!! LOLZ.,


How about Gina? I don't care if people thinks she has a horse face or that she shops at Hot Topic -- the girl can sing!!!! But there are some whispers going around the show that she might get booted because people hate emo. i have no idea what emo is but people seem to be making a big deal out of it.


I'm really sad that the one who really might be going home is Chris Richardson. He's cute, he can do more runs than most diarrehetics....but he's just not one of the stronger male contestants. That title goes to BLACK LEWIS THE CUTEST MAN IN THE WORLD!!!




AREN'T YOU JUST SALIVATING OVER THIS BEAT BOX MASTER, LADIES? HE IS SO ADORABLE AND HIS VOICE JUST SOUNDS LIKE BUTTER ALL OVER YOUR BODY!!! hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

Okay! I'll stop before I get in trouble (again)! I'll see you tonight on the tube when we see who gets to go home, jack!

XOXO

PAULA

SANJAYA'S SISTER HAS A NICE RACK

Hello Friends in the American Idol Blogger World! How are we doing this fine beautiful week! It's sunny and warm and fluffy here in Los Angeles AND I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU ALL THAT I LOVE YOU SOOO SOO MUCH!!!! MUAH MUAH!!! **KISSES** **KISSES**



So we're down to 10 FINALISTS!!! Stephanie Edwards (the one with all the glue in her hair) was voted off the show!!!! Can you believe this!?! She was one of the best singers on the stage and SHE WAS KICKED OFFF!!@! I don't know what to say except DON'T WORRY STEPHANIE WE WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER YOUR SMOOTH VOICE AND SHAPELY HAIR STYLINGSS!!!!!! YOU WILL BE MISSED!!!!

All eyes are on Sanjaya now....will he make it to the top? Will he be voted off next week? Will my pharmacist EVER FILL MY PRESCRIPTIONS WITHOUT A DOCTOR'S NOTE THIS WEEKEND?!! A lot is up in the air...but I tell you what I don't believe...

I don't believe Sanjaya is a joke. I don't think he can't sing. He's like a little Michael Jackson fetus now. Soon he will grow into a bigger Michael Jackson Man Child and Take the World By Storm!!! I can feel it!!!!

DON'T LISTEN TO THE HATERS SANJAYA!!! YOUR LIPS ARE BEAUTIFUL AND I WANT TO LICK YOUR PEACH FUZZED MUSTACHE!!!!!!

Probably the most shocking news of the week is the revelation that SANJAYA'S SISTER HAS THE BIGGEST BOOBIES I HAVE EVER SEEN!!!

Remember his sister? She was in the Idol Auditions but we judges voted her off because we thought the show would be more hilarious with a dude who creeps people out on it?

WELL THIS CHICK HAS A NICE PAIR OF BOOBS! BEHOLD!!!


You like? How about some bouncing boobies?


And I know many of my male readers would probably like another....

WOOOOOOOOOooooooooooo!

I hope you guys didn't just explode onto your computer screens. Is is it weird to think that you want to bang somebody that's related to SANJAYA!!!?!?! LOL

JUST KIDDING SANJAYA!!@! WE LOVE YOU!!! WE WANT TO SEE YOU NEXT WEEK! AND WE'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR NEXT HAIRSTYLE!!!

XOXOX

PAULA

AMERICAN IDOL ROUNDUP: ONE MORE DOWN AND WHERE IS MELINDA DOOLITTLE'S NECK?

Hello PEOPLE I LUVVVVVV YOOOUUUUUUUUUUUU! Long time no talk, and you should know that even though I don't blog in here every day, that I love you and that if I could hug each and every one of you people in the blogosphere (is that what it's called) I would...BECAUSE YOU ARE ALL WONDERFUL!!!!

It's always sad when one of the contestants hit's the road, and during the final 12 it's even harder. This week we said goodbye to Brandon Rogers. I AM SOOO PROUD OF BRANDON. He had a great smile, a terrific stage presents, and totally didn't never ever ever look like a typical Los Angeles actor who's as fake as a three dollar bill. Brandon is beautiful. He has a smooth voice, that Lenny Kravitz hair, and a smile that makes my knees wobble.

Then why did he go? Well, apparently America is in love with Sanjaya, that sweet little soul so many of us want to cradle like a little gay kitten. I totally under stand this for I, too, am a fan of Sanjaya. He's reminds me of a younger, blacker Michael Jackson! HE IS ADORABLE!!! His soft voice...that girlish giggle....his sweet dance moves. And his voice...it's so pleasant....it's so calming....it's so...THE SECOND COMING OF MICHAEL JACKSON!?!?!?!?!

ZOMG!?!?!?!?!!!!!! IS MICHALE JACKSON REALLLY CHANNELING HIMSELF THROUGH AMERICAN IDOL CONTESTANT SANJAYA!!!!!

We can only hope FOR HE IS SOOOO LOVALBLE I JUST WANT TO SQUISH HIS LITTLE NOSE AND PERM IS FLUFFY HAIR!!!!

ahhh......so happy right now.

Lots of people are complaining that the singers this year aren't that good compared to years pasts. To those people I say TAKE A CHILL PILL (but don't take any of mine LOLZ ....;) ...) I think we just need to wait for everybody to come out of their shells.....IT'S SCARY ON THE BIG STAGE!!! Usually people have some to drink before going on stage (I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!!!), but these people are just kids. GIVE THEM A CHANCE!!!!

Meanwhile...I don't mean to be mean...but...where is Melinda Doolittle's neck?

I TOT@LLY DON'T WANT TO BANG ANY OF THIS YEARS AMERICAN IDOLZ!

HELLO! HELLO! HELLO!

How is everybody doing in bloggerland? I LOVE YOU! I absolutely adore being part of the AMERICAN IDOL BLOGGING COMMUNITY! There are so many of you out here that care so much about the show that I just want you to know that I'm here and that I love you AND THAT I WANT TO TALK TO YOU!!!!

In just a couple hours we go live on the air and choose the FINAL 12!?!?! Can you believe we're here already? It's just crazy. It's amazing. I cannot believe the talent we have here this season. IT IS TALENT IN ALL CAPS!!!!

Now some of been saying that tthis is the worst season in American Idol History. I think that's disagreeable. While some of the guys you might make an argument for cannot sing, they are pretty cute. And doesn't that matter to? We like to say that American Idol is a singing competition, but let's not kid ourselves here....IMAGE IS EVERYTHING!!!! AND I LOVE IMAGE AND I LOVE OUR AMERICAN IDOLS THIS YEAR!!!!

YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Cuteness goes a long way. A LONG WAY. Remeber that guy I allegedly had an affair with a few seasons ago? Well, he was allegedly cute and I would totally allegedly bang him, even IF HE COULDN'T SING. But this is a competition, and I don't discriminate!!!!!!!Q!!!!!!!!

ANYWHOOOOOOOO. WHO IS GOING TO BE KICKED OFF TONIGHT?!?!

Ms. WhorePants Antonella Barbra!?! Yes!

Ms. Haley I'm So Boring Somebody Please Stab My Eyes Scarnato! Yes!!!

Mr. Chubby Cakes Cutie McGee? No!?!

Mrs. Sanjaya Michael Jackson?! Yes! Please Yes!!!

Well, those are my pics. If I had it my way EVERY SINGLE CONTESTANT WOULD BE AN AMERICAN IDOL AND THEN WE CAN ALL LIVE ON A GIANT CLOUD AND HUG EACH OTHER TILL GOD SHINES HIS AWESOME LIGHT ON ALL OF US!!!! YEAH FOR GOODNESS AND LIGHT!!!!!!!

WOOps....they've come to take me to the set. See you in a few....

Paula!

OMG! DID YOU SEE KELLIE PICKLER'S BOOBIES!?!?!

HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Pauala here and wheewwwwww....this week was a doozy. We had one girl who couldn't keep her clothes on and basically showed the worldd that she's the biggest ho in the world, and then last night, OMG -- KELLIE PICKLER SHOWED US HER BIG BAD FLOPPING BALDY BOOBIES!!!


Can I just say that I LOVE HER! SHE IS THE MOST ADORABLE PERSON IN THE WHOLE WORLD! Not only is she a damn fine singer --- she had the MOST NICEST BOOBS IN THE WHOLE WORLD! And yes friends --- THEY ARE NEW AND THEY ARE FAKE AND THEY ARE FANTASTIC!!!

I think this should be a lession to American Idol contestants -- BOOBS WILL GET YOU FAR IN AMERICAN IDOL! Kelly didn't even come close to winner last year, yet HERE SHE IS WITH HER BIG FAKE BOOBIES AND SHE'S WONDERFUL!!!

Same goes with Antonella Barba! Her voice isn't the best in the world (ALTHOUGH IT IS WONDERFUL!) yet America decided to put her threw last night because she is hot! Hot girls always get the vote! And even though the uglier contestants like that neck-less Melinda Doolittle can sing, they will probably never get that far in the competition because they are not that attractive!!! Fantasia was an exception because she had a nice bootie and i bet she totally puts out (she3 has a kid after all) BUT I LOVE THEM ALL!!!!!! EVERY AMERICAN IDOL CONTESTANT IS WONDERFUL!!!!!


I just want to give my shout outs to all the contestants who didn't make it this week! Nicholas, AJ, Alaina, and Leslie -- YOU ARE ALL AMAZING SINGERS WHO SHOULD DEF COME BACK NEXT YEAR! AND Leslie, you jazz scatting is AMAZING! I don't care that people say you look like a porkchop or your scatting sounds like you're trying to exorcizer the devil out of a chicken -- YOU ARE AMAZING! ALL OF YOU!

WELL THAT'S ANOTHER WEEK!!!!!!!! Soon we'll have our American Idol -- and can feel it because it's a wonderful, lovely feeling!!!!!

I'm going to CABO CANTINA TONIGHT IN HOLLYWOOD IF ANYONE WANTS TO JOIN ME!!! THERE'S A MARGITA SPECIAL FROM 4-8 BUT I WONT BE DRINKING! I'LL ONLY TAKE A SIP I THINK AS I SCARF DOWN SOME BURRITOS!!!! I LOVE MEXICAN FOOOOOOODDDD!!!

<3 PAULA <3