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Reason Not To Have Kids #267

By: Slippy Jenkins
November 10 2009, 9:24 AM

Seriously, if your kid is just going to narc you out to their teacher, what good are they anyway? Kids are for tying your shoe laces, grabbing you a beer and that's about it. You shouldn't have to worry about them telling everyone they know that you earn money making it rain for perverts. LiquidGeneration's been making games and animations about boobs and Britney Spears' drunk butt for years, and our nephews still think we sell insurance. Seriously! Every time I come home for Christmas they never ask me how work's going because they feel sorry for me. Anyway, there's just some things your child shouldn't know and your stripper job is one of them. Also: never bring your work home with you.

(via Don Chavez)

 
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Announcing The Next Michael Jackson

By: Slippy Jenkins
November 09 2009, 12:35 PM

Folks, we've been blessed with another Michael Jackson. Kinda. Here's a before and after of alledged steroid abuser/baseball player Sammy Sosa. Now we have no idea whether he bleaches his skin or has that crazy vitiglio disease, but we DO KNOW that his face looks squishy like a Madball. AMMIIRITTTTE GUYS?

 

 

Grossest Picture Ever?

Grossest Picture Ever?

Part of us is jealous and we wish this would happen to our foot. It would be a great way to spend the afternoon.

 

Sex Scene or Murder Scene?

Sex Scene or Murder Scene?

Did she score or did she get gored? Check out pictures from movies and try to guess whether the girls are getting it on or getting murdered.

 

Hot or Heavy?

Hot or Heavy?

We show you the picture of a girl's face and you have to guess whether she's a hotty or a big fat lady! It's hard. That's what she said!

 

Christina Hendricks Marries Someone

Christina Hendricks Marries Someone

Mad Men star Christina Hendricks married someone this weekend. Not this guy though; he's just somebody with a cool mustache. Anyway, this picture should remind you that her new husband is probably the luckiest man alive. So is mustache man for standing next to her.

 

What's Weird About This Picture?

What's Weird About This Picture?

There's something a "little" funny about this picture.

 

Celebrity Yearbook Game

Celebrity Yearbook Game

We've found pictures of all your favorite celebrities at the most horrible and embarrassing time of life: middle school. Can you see past the pimples and find your favorite (soon-to-be) celebrity?

 

Olivia Wilde Can Make Us Read GQ

Olivia Wilde Can Make Us Read GQ

Even though we would never be caught dead reading GQ Magazine (for fear that it will make us start dressing better!). But if they continue to populate that magazine with pictures like this, we'll get a lifetime subscription.

 

Pig or People?

Pig or People?

We show you a picture of a person or pig with tattoos and you have to guess which it is. Pigs are sexy!

 

Beer Goggle Fail

Beer Goggle Fail

I love how the two a-holes below them are posing for a picture. Those are lifetime friends.

 

Sex Scene or Murder Scene 4?

Sex Scene or Murder Scene 4?

We show you a picture from a famous movie and you have to tell us whether it’s from a sex scene or murder scene. This is for movie nerds and perverts only.

 

Guess The Celebrity Fatty!

Guess The Celebrity Fatty!

We show you a picture of a celebrity who's kind of chunky and you have to guess who it is!

 

Chick or Dude? Olympics Edition

Chick or Dude? Olympics Edition

We show you a picture of a beast of a man or man/woman and you have to guess which it is!

 

Perez Hilton vs. Beeker

Perez Hilton vs. Beeker

Perez Hitlon got his ass beat by one of Will.i.Am's (ANNOYING NAME, DUDE!) people at the MuchMusic Awards this past weekend. Later The Mighty Gay One made a video about what happened, which is where this picture came from. It's fun to see this dude cry, right?

 

Anna Faris Marries Some Fat Dude

Anna Faris Marries Some Fat Dude

You might have thought that Anna Faris would be perfect for you because she seems like a regular chick and she's funny and seems to be into fat dudes. Well, you're right. Except for the part about being into you...she's into the fat dude pictured above, who she married over the weekend.

 

Audrina Partridge Is Bikini Hot

Audrina Partridge Is Bikini Hot

These pictures of Audrina Partridge in Cabo seriously make me forget she doesn't have a brain.

 

Kourtney Kardashian Has Side Boobs

Kourtney Kardashian Has Side Boobs

We don't pay attention to Kourtney Kardashian that much. But that's all changed with these pictures.

 

Sex Face or Sports Face

Sex Face or Sports Face

We’re gonna show you a picture and you have to guess whether it’s a sports face or sex face. Don’t let this get you too excited. Your mom is in the other room.

 

Kim Kardashian Drinks Stuff

Kim Kardashian Drinks Stuff

We don't care if this is just an obvious ad for Pepsi. This is a photo of Kim Kardashian and we're required to post every picture of her.

 

OTHER COOL STUFF