Reports of Paris being a lesbian are false, she's only into her own lady bits.

ADSjopojSDIOJlkdlkjdaop....oh sorry, had to turn off my Hawaii Chair to type, but my abs are looking great!

In theaters 12-25-08. From director J.J. Abrams (“Mission: Impossible III,” “Lost” and “Alias”) and screenwriters Roberto Orci & Alex Kurtzman (“TRANSFORMERS,” “MI: III”) comes a new vision of the greatest space adventure of all time, “Star Trek,” featuring a young, new crew venturing boldly where no man has gone before.

Remember those pictures of her unfavorable backside? Well it seems Jennifer Love Hewitt's two best friends had something to say about that on the red carpet last night.

Wanna scare the baby Jesus out of your friends? All you have to do is wipe the frosting off this window to get a very special Christmas present.

Ike Turner died this week, blah blah blah. However the New York Post had a great tagline for it's piece "honoring" his death.

After attending a Kennedy Center gala, the White House realized someone had stolen several yards of curtains from the Oval Office.

Decent Photoshop or white trash soup kitchen? Hmm Olive Garden sounds really appetizing all of a sudden.

In theaters 12-7-07. The greatest trick that he ever pulled was making you believe that he is you.

That Cadbury Gorilla was great and all but if we're serious about replacing Phil Collins what is better than a girl in a Wonderbra?

… because we can’t let the terrorists win.

In theaters 12-25-07. A drama based on the true story of Melvin B. Tolson, a professor at Wiley College Texas. In 1935, he inspired students to form the school's first debate team, which went on to challenge Harvard in the national championship.

This fish, known as a Great Swallower, bite off a little more than it could chew. Then, in a moment of pure brilliance, his stomach split open and he died.

Awww dressed up like Snow White, rabies all of a sudden isn't so scary.

The great part about this costume is the hours after the party when you try and find her ac/dc input.

Britney tries to escape the set of Donald's new reality TV show with the help of a clever disguise and a wish… and a dream. Will she make it? Will you care?

Ok so she isn't famous, but her husband is. If this woman gets any bigger her breasts are going to pop off. Great to have much naked fun time in America!

In theaters 2-15-08. A family settles into its vacation home, which happens to be the next stop for a pair of young, articulate, white-gloved serial killers on an excursion through the neighborhood.

Someone left Dina Lohan in the dryer too long and she done shrunked. 3 feet or not, she still plans on furiously ruining her daughters life.

Are you as revolted by the Meg White Sex Tape as this reporter is? We hope so.