Let Tom Cruise tell you all about Scientology, Xenu and how you can give yourself a free auditing test!

When 1 minute is just too much time to wait, feel free to shoot yourself. No toast for you.

Crowds are good for many things. Free titty grabs are one of those things.

Scientists in South Korea have so much free time, they have managed to clone glow in the dark cats. Now they can fight off the flying monkeys from N. Korea.

After months of China sending us all their ass backwards products, the US finally retaliated by sending over Paris Hilton, in a free container marked "Penis Enlargement Cream."

Sienna Miller is pissed about nudie pics leaking from the set of Hippie Hippie Shake. In fairness the boobs and "hippie garden" will be covered during a CGI drug trip.

That little Zac Efron chick was caught taking nude pictures of herself. No wait, this is the other female lead. Ah who cares, free boobs!

Anna Ferris wrangled up enough free time on the set of her new movie, to pee on Rumer Willis. In all honesty, we have NO IDEA what is going on here.

Madonna spent the day at the beach frolicking in the waves and giving the paparazzi a free show. Nothing better than aged leather.

This guy "hacked" a Coke machine with his cell phone, making it dispense quarters and free water – but then revealed his trick!

A dry erase board + lots of free time + shrooms = awesome moving images.

More fun Mentos and Coke tricks. Thank god these guys have so much free time on their hands; what'd we do with out such a thrilling video?

Hello and welcome to whose boobs the only on-line game to hi-jack the top five stories of the Boob-itomi towers.

Now that she's been released from prison, Paris is on her way to annoy the hell out of he neighbors in the Hollywood Hills.

Happy Paris was greeted by the press and her family outside Lynwood Correction Facility at her releasal Monday night.

Paris Hilton gets escorted from Lynwood Monday night – a free woman!

Live Free or Die Hard? It’s the movie title that’s already a who’d you rather.

Now that she's BACK in rehab with a DUI under her belt, Svedka Vodka has pulled the plug on hosting her party (as in, busloads of free vodka) and the tragic irony of a 20-year-old in a drunk driving accident just weeks before her 21st birthday starts to sink in. Fun!

That's one royal handful you've got there, Willy!

I don't get it. Is it free to enter, and $5 to leave? WTF?