J.K. Richpants recently announced that Dumbledore, from the popular Harry Potter books, was gay. Gays everywhere rejoiced, until they realized… being dead, Dumbledore would have no nude shower scene.

This guy is going to get so much ass tonight! Oh, he just threw up on himself? LIGHTNING ROUND!

Weather men are often overlooked as the newsworthy sex gods they are. That being said, we feel sorry for Pennsylvania. According to jumbo here they are in for a sticky weekend.

We beer sex pizza mile high nachos this commercial very much.

These images of Mrs. Smith where released today accompanying claims she was nearly dead, covered in her own vomit, when they were taken.

This commercial is an exact copy of how a 16-year-old boy's mind works; EVERYTHING implies sex.

With Sex and the City coming to HD DVD, everyone will be able to bask in the gloriousness that is the petrified face of Sarah Jessica Parker.

Lord! Its like 300 lbs of all beef hotness broiled over a bed of sex! Those vaguely human features, coupled with those tumor ridden arms is pure hotness.

Adrian was not only the coolest red head on the block, but he was a bona fide sith lord. With his trusty lightsaber in hand, he was guaranteed to fend off any unwanted vaginal advances.

Thank god! Finally a place we can take our families without having to deal with all those damned homos! We will never again have to worry about gay men breaking into our houses and having anal sex in front of our children or us.

On set of the new Sex in the City movie, Kim Cattrall is heavily marinated in WD40, allowing her to move properly. Being covered in foreign substances is something her character knows all too well.

Are you as revolted by the Meg White Sex Tape as this reporter is? We hope so.

In theaters 11-21-07. Directed by the Coen Brothers and based on the acclaimed novel by Cormac McCarthy. Violence and mayhem ensue after a hunter stumbles upon some dead bodies, a stash of heroin and more than $2 million in cash near the Rio Grande.

In theaters 10-26-07. Jigsaw and his apprentice Amanda are dead. The genesis of Jigsaw's evil is unveiled, exposing the puppet master's true intentions and the sinister plan for his past, present and future victims.

You think you know sex? You don’t know sex like these two do. Why are you still looking at this picture, you are sick.

Courtney Love is currently preparing for a zombie death match with Kurt over how she has ruined Nirvana's legacy one paycheck at a time.

This one time at band camp, there was like sex everywhere. The G note was doing the A from behind. And the B-flat was blowing C.

Is it sad when an ad for condoms, depicting a sexual act, physically arouses you? Not that we have that problem...So what are you doing tonight? Please come back…

Leaving her Hotel room this week, Madonna was spotted walking out with a Sex Toy. Now we know Guy Ritchie can satisfy neither his wife or film critics.

Ice T must have sex with plastic "love" dolls, because that is apparently his type. This is not even realistic, Photoshop much?