Anna Nicole Smith died in a south Florida hotel, after collapsing in her room at the Hard Rock Hotel in Hollywood, FL. Rest in peace, Crazy Lady.

Dead or Alive rocker-turned-plastic tranny freak Pete Burns is suing the plastic surgeon that destroyed his lips in an attempt to correct the over-done airbags that they'd become.

Still-skinny Mary-Kate Olsen looked stunning (as in, we're still stunned by this look) when she walked the red carpet wearing Kelly green, a dead raccoon, and a chestplate.

A dead Saddam sings about what the world will be like without him to the tune of Beyonce’s "Irreplaceable." If this doesn’t make you cry over his execution nothing will.

The O.C. is dead. Liquid Generation tries to make sense of a senseless world.

Classic SNL skit where "Tom Brokaw" tapes possible outcomes if Gerald Ford were to die. I personally like the wild dogs attack.

Learn how to kill your wealthy, elderly husband with just a few seductive dance moves!

The cake got 5 full pages, but the rest of the wedding album featured the bride and groom: a tiny Japanese immigrant woman and her white, 350-lb. programmer husband.

Clean up around the house, gentlemen, or your lady could end up dead.

"How to tell if you have gay hands." I always thought my manicure was the dead giveaway.

Anna Nicole makes cash, Spinach makes you sick, and the Paparazzi makes Diaz’s day. Philip Norris has the stories, and he’s hopped up on “Cocaine.”

If you’re always dropping your baby and your husband is a total douche bag, there’s only one man to call – The Manny! Join Britney Spears, Kevin Federline and the new man in her life, The Manny, in this new animated sitcom!

Watch Britney Spears cry, talk about her white trash husband, and the fact that she's a horrible mom, all on The Today Show.

What if a frozen Jack Dawson came back from the dead and had to live life in the Future!?! Crazy!

These boobs drink lots and lots of Metamucil.

This week somebody kills Santa, Morgan Freeman stops racism, people search for Britney Spears on the internets and Kevin Federline drives a Ferrari. Not much going on.

Kids, this is what happens when you snort too much cocaine off a dead hooker's ass.

It's official. Some people have a fetish for dead people.

Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.

Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.