"Excuse me, is that your butt winking at my butt?"

We feel silly for using our own hands to wipe our ass all these years. If we knew the Comfort Wipe existed, our life would be so much more awesome and our hands would be a lot less smelly. And brown.

John McCain's reaction to the Dramatic Gopher crawling up his butt.

This isn't very convincing since the ability to respawn in real life would encourage much worse behavior than smoking butts.

This commercial for Marlboro and the NFL provides a valuable history lesson; it wasn't always Chunky Soup and smiles, it used to be racism, butts, and cartoons. Ah the good ole days.

This kid went into his local Wal-Mart and would not stop rapping Baby Got Back over the intercom until they kicked him out. Way to go Jonah Hill look-a-like.

Samwell is a dance music "artist" whose sexual preferences tend to lean towards being very, very, very gay. Real gay.

See what happens when you scratch the forbidden zone.

We looked for strechmarks on Britney Spears' butt and we couldn't find any. Her body really snapped back!

Who know how bikini butts could help sell beer? I did!

What sport is yet to be parodied in a major motion picture? Why, professional figure skating, that's what! I can't wait to see Well Ferrell skate his butt off.

Two of the best butts in the business get friendly at the Golden Globes. Thank you, Access Hollywood.

Her butt has my vote!

Take it from this real-life security camera: fat guys shouldn't photocopy their butts. (Uhhh, why does the supply room have a security camera?)

Introducing the Amazing Butt Flex! Pazzow!!!!

Do you find Butt Floss sexy? Some people do, especially these ladies. And they love to show it off!

You've seent he Zidane head butt footage, but have you seen all of it? This is a compilation of the internet's best CGI'd Zidane footage.