If you’re a drunk, or if you just drink by yourself and in the morning, you might want to take this quiz. Hell, if you drink your own vomit and urine than take this, too.

If you’re eating a delicious plate of Sesame Chicken right now you may want to stop.

This is what you look like if you play video games for too long.

Somebody should put this guy out of his misery. What a little bitch!

Just because you stare longingly at a pair of ripe, voluptuous boobs in need of love and attention, that makes you a little pervert!?!

Here’s a classic Saturday Night Live skit with lots and lots of cowbell.

Nothing makes your hands clean like a little love juice from the Knight Rider himself!

Here’s a tribute to those bisexually ambiguous Weezer-worshiping dorks that we call Emo Kids! We love you guys!

Here’s a shot-for-shot reproduction of the Full House intro by some indie San Francisco band. Totally rad!

Send your friends and family a New Years Eve e-card that doubles as a warning not to get drunk and knocked up in the New Year.

This week your family celebrates a holiday, Elton John gets married, New Yorkers walk to work, and the inventor of the internets starts a blog.

Here’s a collection of people who really pissed us off this year. May they burn.

See what happens when a midget alligator chases the faces of silly Japanese women.

We know that Dubya had a drinking problem, but we didn’t know he was still a drunk.

This is what it looks like when you try to pull a condom off your head.

We hate it when our dad uses our head as a urine sink.

Okay, how did somebody get a picture of us installing our new graphics card?

This chick must have a huge earwax problem.

This week somebody kills Santa, Morgan Freeman stops racism, people search for Britney Spears on the internets and Kevin Federline drives a Ferrari. Not much going on.

Don’t know what to get everybody for Christmas? Why don’t you take a look at our crappy shopping guide?