Here's Lindsay Lohan on the set of her new movie Machete. How she's working again we have no idea. All we know is that she sucks at using spray tan.

Heidi, Spencer, & Hulk Hogan all wear Ed Hardy's pseudo-tattoo covered line of clothes, they are also giant douches. Coincidence? We think not.

One of the side effects of taking the Red Pill is you will never ever get a tan.

That's all, can't a man love the gold accents and tailored fits of a clothing line without everyone calling him names?

Sometimes when you're applying the spray on you're drunk and decide the tan line beard look is in.

Being a Guido is a full time job, hair doesn't gel itself, tans don't spray themselves on, and chests don't wax themselves, a Guido's gotta do it himself.

Marc Jacobs unveiled his new line of Arabian Sheik outerwear. The desert camel toe is ALWAYS a good look.

How fat do you have to be in order for a DSL line to have trouble downloading your picture? This fat.

This picture was drawn with one continuous line. Yeah, you're jealous.

… is not like the others. Poor little pasty Jan Brady got lost amongst a sea of breasticles. She needed some of that fake Britney ab tan.

What made Jennifer Lopez decide that this was the best outfit to showcase at the launch of her new clothing line? She looks like a fruit rollup or a tall oompa loompa.

Wow, nothing says sexy like a surgary brown tan and thigh muscles so strong, she could crack your head open. Snap into a slim Jim!

Sisley's new controversial ad campaign features skinny models with their eyes rolled back, snorting "lines" off a white dress. Apparently spelling "fashion" like "heroin" is also chic, now.

Paris wanted a very *full*-coverage tan in Hawaii, and didn't care who saw!

George Clooney is looking extra gaunt these days, and that gross tan isn't helping him look better or younger. Just say no to Nicole Richie!!

Jessica Simpson's gained weight recently, and it's really started to show. All the spray-on tanner in the world can't hide these rolls!!

When you're the world's sluttiest heiress, you have to pose everywhere you are. Even in a tanning bed.

Is that a white residue better known for lining the nostrils of Hollywood's biggest partiers? Or are we just jerks?

I can only assume this guy showed up at the PS3 line outside of Best Buy, trying to taunt the rival gamers. Bravo, sir, your life is complete.

You'll never be "board" with this game for the whole family!