Or at least a well staged photograph.

The Sacremento Kings dancers are being "disciplined" for getting drunk and taking sexy pics. And the NBA wonders why no one watches.

Just put a meat bone in her hand and Sarah Jessica Parker looks just as sexy as Dee Snider in Twisted Sister. Here she is on the set of the new Sex & The City 2, during a flashback of sorts to the 80s, when she was uglier.

If you're even close to hot you should do what you can to get this costume and bring it to the Harry Potter premiere this week.

We're suddenly turned on by the lazy, furry cat.

If you're wondering who Leighton Meester is, this is her. TMZ is reporting she has a sex tape that's being shopped around Hollywood. And it involves her feet. Sexy!

Avert your eyes!?! Get sexy with yourself!?! We can't tell what's going on here either.

Oksana Pochepa is the Russian pop star who's allegedly banging Mel Gibson. We salute you, Mel Gibson. Girls who don't speak English are sexy.

Yeah, we think Barbie is a lot sexier than Mickey Mouse, too.

That's some sexy makeup!

I wish all Holiday seasons were filled with this much love.

With the Death Star complete and Santa out of the way, nothing can stop them from destroying Alderon!

If you don't get this guy a present, he'll forever stare at you from across the room.

Not the most sexy picture of Kim Kardashian, especially with all that farting going on.

Nothing turns us on more than man hands and alien face.

The most shocking thing is not how sexy she looks at age 16, it's how shockingly 90s the photo backdrop is.

Britney presents a strong case for both sides, looking at her it is hard to argue there is an "intelligent design" while it is also questionable we are moving forward as a species.

This pacman tree has the power to swallow Christmas hole and spit out a kick ass holiday. Barring that Christmas doesn’t return from the blue state and kill Pac Man.

Sexual thoughts aside… what's with the blue outfit? There isn't much sexy about screwing a zip lock bag.

How fat do you have to be in order for a DSL line to have trouble downloading your picture? This fat.