This is sexist because it's true.

She's Brazilian, she's tabloid famous and what you really want to know, her butt measures 46 inches all the way around. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it if that's at all possible given the size constraints.

Remember Natalie Imbruglia? She sings that one song we forgot the name off? Well yeah, here she is. She had to wear a bikini to make people notice here again.

Avert your eyes!?! Get sexy with yourself!?! We can't tell what's going on here either.

No, you're not seeing things. Those are a bunch of Princess Leias being hot and awesome and hitting each other with pillows.

Adam Lambert uses more coverup than every tranny on the earth combined.

This is Demi Moore and now you don't have a boner for her.

You don't have to see this girl's face; it's busted. Instead, look at the ocean...the beach...that dude with the towel on his head. If you like, you can also look at Shauna's boobs.

Oh look! Our favorite non-celebrity announced she's pregnant on Twitter. Here's what her stomach is going to look like in a couple months, as imagined by our friends at Starcasm.com.

Normally we're against breast implants. But Bikini Girl's new boobs make her face look a lot less stupid, so we approve!

Kara, why did you hide what's underneath your clothes throughout the whole season? We find you a lot less annoying and totally pointless now.

There's fine print for everything. A shame.

Just face it: you will never get a girl as hot as Hayden, just continue to be a big fat dork.

If you have to wear a bathing suit this summer, make sure you have boobs.

It's funny because it's true. And you're a loser.

What the hell is she wearing? Underwear on underwear!?! Stylish!

We don't care if this is just an obvious ad for Pepsi. This is a photo of Kim Kardashian and we're required to post every picture of her.

Damn. What happened to Kelly Clarkson? Looks like she's gonna chock on a ham sandwich some day.

Donald Trump just pardoned Miss California for being a homophobe and appearing nude in photos. We don't care whether she's Satan or Charles Manson, just keep on taking photos like these.

It's tiny, but it's there. And so is her crack. Crack is whack, but not on Paris.