Oh, look who got a new pair of boobs! And from the looks of it they fell right out of a gumball machine and onto her chest. Now we know Amy is rich, so why does it look like she has a cheap a boob job as that girl in high school who got addicted to crack, like, ten years later?

What is she, like, 55-years-old now? Jennifer Aniston is still banging 35 years after Friends. This is a photo from her appearance this month in Elle Magazine.

Oh, little puppy! Aren't you glad you're not Paris Hilton's? Oh, yes you are! Oh yes you are!

Doesn't he look like that old chick from Driving Miss Daisy? Yes he does!

She has to be around 55-years-old, but Jennifer Connelly is still very much a part of our imagination as we daydream about doing it with movie stars.

But really, who cares? Older chicks are awesome and if you don't realize that you're probably and idiot anyway.

If you're looking for an older lady, here is your best bet.

Is Lindsay Lohan attractive anymore? It looks like the skin is melting off her body and she has the ass of an old man. And what's with her Calvin impression? It's just kinda gross.

Wonder whose butt would win in a game of tennis: Kate Hudson's or Anna Kournikova's?

Hugh Hefner's former fake girlfriend Bridget still looks pretty good for being almost 50-years-old. Much love.

The editor of this newspaper has obviously never delivered a pizza to a 40-year-old woman's door and then proceeded to have sex with her.

He fought for equality and now, video games.

When you reach a certain age, things start falling apart. Jenny, we're going to miss you.

This 27-year-old Obama speech writer (left) is in a little trouble for grabbing fake Hillary Clinton's fake boob. We'd understand if he was grabbing Palin's breasteses, cause she's hot, but whatevs. If he likes man-boobs that's his deal.

"Interesting" is the only way we could describe what you're looking at here. We don't want to offend the old lady.

Here's Bono totally not cheating on his wife with two 19-year-old hotties.

We don't care that she's a hundred years old or banged Michael Bolton. Nicolette is bangin'.

How did she not know she was pregnant with a child that large!?!

Introducing the new Lara Croft! This former receptionist turned video game heroine will help promote the video game series by making gamers horny.

Vern Troyer played a little game of golf this week. Get it? A "little game of golf?" Yeah, we don't think we're funny either.