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Sexy Santa Jessica Simpson
Jess just loves her too-tight outfits. We ain't your gynecologist, Jessica!
Jessica Alba's Butt
Let's just say that if I died and they used Jessica's butt as the pillow in my coffin, I'd already be in heaven.
Old Jessica Simpson
This is why Nick Lachey kicked Jessica Simpson to the curb. It's better to cut your losses when you're ahead. Or a dick.