Mickey's eye's are slowly being shut by his plastic surgeon. It's for the best as his career quickly fades away.

...Gotta scratch it... THERE! Got it!

Tara's got the most cock-eyed boobs I've ever seen. Therefore I must gouge out my eyes to see no more.

These boots kick ass! Literally! Err, but if you took them off and put them on your hand, they could *literally* punch you in the face.

Sisley's new controversial ad campaign features skinny models with their eyes rolled back, snorting "lines" off a white dress. Apparently spelling "fashion" like "heroin" is also chic, now.

Happy Paris was greeted by the press and her family outside Lynwood Correction Facility at her releasal Monday night.

Dope perspective! *Rubs eyes*

Sarah Michelle Gellar (or SMG as I call her) was caught on camera with the reddest eyes this side of Jamaica. She was hanging out with Mischa Barton, mayhaps?

Masha Tyelna is a 17-year-old model from the Ukraine, and is considered to have the largest eyes in the modeling world! I'm scared!!

Leave it to Jessica Simpson to make cleavage look sultry yet painful at the same time. I can't take my eyes off her boobs, which is good, 'cause I'm deathly afraid of her orange freak-face.

Visual gags never get old.

Yep. More DJ AM birthday bash photos. Come on, people, it's right there on the table! I have EYES!

Sorry, but it's just kinda freaky to me!

Rose McGowan showed up at a Oscars afterparty with some weird bandaid under her eye. Girl is looking rough!

Liver spots? Check. Bags under the eyes? Check. Sagging mouth? Check. Creepy old lady neck? Check. Looks like Goldie Hawn should be CHECKing in at her plastic surgeon!

Well if jerkin' it wasn't easy enough – now lazy Japanese men can use this gadgit to do it for them!

At one time, Paris used a fake Ohio ID. The weirdest part? It lists her eyes as green, even though she has naturally brown eyes and wears blue contacts!

The "Brief Safe" can secure your cash, documents, and other small valuables from inquisitive eyes and thieving hands, both at home and when you're traveling. These specially-designed briefs contain a fly-accessed 4" x 10" secret compartment with Velcro® closure and "special markings" on the lower rear portion. Even the most hardened burglar or most curious snoop will "skid" to a screeching halt as soon as they see them — wouldn't you?

I think she should just slap an eyepatch on that and get herself some pirate street-cred.

Even cartoons can have wonky eyes.