Here's are some of the models in the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. As you can probably imagine, they are all horrendously hot.

Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend (ex-girlfriend!?!) is happy she's hotter than you.

This is Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend Bar Refaeli. Jealous?

This bar in New Lisbon, Wisc., believes that winners drink and losers pee.

This is the biggest tree in the world and it has been hallowed out to hold an entire bar!

This pacman tree has the power to swallow Christmas hole and spit out a kick ass holiday. Barring that Christmas doesn’t return from the blue state and kill Pac Man.

A world-renowned gay bar caught fire this week. In typical fashion, the gays used it as en excuse to party and freak out the squares. Tom Cruise had no comment.

Even the wind is against Ms. Hilton as she leaves a courthouse appearance. Remember, Paris, behind bars you only get two pairs of undies per week!

These cookies are a must-have for bachelor parties and bar mitzvahs.

What a responsible parent. I bet he rolls that kid's stroller into the bar, too.

This bar is obviously managed by a smart fellow.

Sure, let's just stick our hand in our babies ass and pull out a candy bar.