For those of you who need help following this amazing song you loved to listen to back in the day when you were high on cocaine.

And her "precious" is a nice heaping pile of cocaine.

Perez Hitlon got his ass beat by one of Will.i.Am's (ANNOYING NAME, DUDE!) people at the MuchMusic Awards this past weekend. Later The Mighty Gay One made a video about what happened, which is where this picture came from. It's fun to see this dude cry, right?

BREAKING NEWS: Lindsay Lohan is going to give birth to a bag of cocaine!

Here's a leaked screen shot from one of Britney Spears' music videos. It's censored because her nipples aren't really that big a deal.

He fought for equality and now, video games.

Here are some photos of Britney from here latest video shoot. We likey.

Introducing the new Lara Croft! This former receptionist turned video game heroine will help promote the video game series by making gamers horny.

Here's hoping Kristen Bell never finds out where Hyde is or how wonderful cocaine makes you feel and spends her life innocent and signing autographs at comic book conventions.

Some random guy is selling his entire lifetime of video game systems and cartridges for a whopping $14,000. Maybe with all that money he can finally see what a vagina looks like.

If you have ever wondered what a hideous and washed up super model, full of meth and coke, looked like...

Former Backstreet Boy Nick, spent the weekend filming for a new music video. From the looks of this video, he had the liquid squirts.

Paris Hilton has begun her promised change for the better. Here she is holding a baby without dropping it or feeding it Frosted Cocaine Flakes.

In Germany the future has arrived. You can play video games while you pee.

Britney got drunk and topless after shooting a "video". Her assistant arranged for her to make out with an extra. He sold the pictures to pay for the doctor's visit the next day.

According to sources on the set of her latest music video, Britney Spears was so emotionally distressed that she demanded all the extras leave the stage while she attempted to pole dance. Let us pray that poor pole was heavily disinfected… scratch that - just burn it.

This morning a little after 2 AM, Lindsay Lohan was arrested on suspicion of DUI. She blew a .12 percent, and was later charged with possession of cocaine. Excellent work, Lindsay. Excellent.

This is a shot from an upcoming workout video starring Lisa Rinna. The perfect gift for aging cougars who need a boost to their physical self-esteem.

Amy Winehouse may have alcoholism in her name, but she also has blow in her nose! When whiskey makes you fat, how does one keep in brillant shape? Snort away the pounds!

Some of Paris Hilton's possessions were auctioned off, including hundreds of very private photos and, journals, and video. Here she is pretending to be clean. LIAR!