This is how classy we are when we pick up chicks.

Too soon? Come on people, the Civil War was almost 150 years ago. He's merely suggesting that he'd sacrifice another million plus soldiers to keep the South's "freedoms" intact.

Eliot Spitzer's favorite hooker seems to have an equally classy past.

Keep it classy Heidi. Yes that’s a camera and yes, that’s your ass.

Eva Longoria spent the weekend on the beach. In typical, classy lady fashion, she showed the world her butt crack on numerous occasions.

"I love her so much, and I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve." Barf! Nothing says "Take me back." like a tattoo of your ex's titties. Classy man.

Seriously, someone just needs to take this poor girl aside and euthanize her. Was their a shortage of classy dresses in her trailer? Is she trying to turn guys gay? WHY GOD WHY!?

Kanye West and P. Diddy were guests at England's "concert for Diana," where they posed with her son, Prince Harry. Kanye wore douche-bag 80s Pringles sunglasses and Diddy sported the classiest Diana t-shirt he could find in the hamper. Great job, guys.

Classy-lookin' Lins was seen holding some book that's supposed to help her get a boyfriend. But we think that dress will do just fine!!

Tara, Tara, Tara. Seriously, I don't think you know the real meaning of classy, because it includes a bra.

Jenna Jameson and Paris Hilton are pegged to host a new reality TV series that basically gets virgins laid. It's being made by the same guy that released the Paris Hilton sex tape, so you know it's gonna be classy.

Recent trip to a West Hollywood burger joint: Britney's classy!

Recent trip to a West Hollywood burger joint part deux: wait, no, Britney's not classy.

Really, no caption can do this classy lady any justice. *SHUDDER*