She's Brian Austin Green's girlfriend, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't respect her sexiest! Philip Norris has more...

Lou is the FIRST to interview Britney Spears, who has just gone cuckoo for Cocopuffs. See her meltdown right before your eyes!

Philip Norris can't afford gas, and so can't you. It's okay, he has a couple solutions.

Jamie Lynn Spears has had her illegitimate child. Congrats Jamie Lynn, you are officially more white trash than your sister!

This week Philip Norris explains why you have really bad taste in movies. BTW Jared Leto is a tool.

Lindsay Lohan got all nude on us for a photo shoot, and Philip Norris has a lot to say about it!

Vote for Phillip Norris in 2008! He has a plan to end the war, stop a recession, and start telling polish jokes again!

Heath Ledger is dead and Philip Norris is angry. Find out why, and what his rant has to do with soccer balls!

After Britney Spears ditched out on yet another custody hearing, she went to church! Has Britney finally found The Jesus!

Jamie Lynn Spears has gotten herself all preggers! We do not need any more Spears children in this world!

This week Britney has ADD, Lindsay Lohan's dad has a noonie, and the writers strike...gold!

This week Britney loses her kids, David Copperfield rapes somebody, and other important worldly events. Philip Norris has the latest!

This week Lou Berk sits down with Britney Spears’ mom, who allegedly had a sexual affair with Kevin Federline.

Soccer Star David Beckham and his hot Spice Wife have settled down state side. Who better to give them a proper American greeting than Philip Norris?

We did it. We caved in to your demands. Philip Norris has returned to the LG news desk and he has a year’s worth of stories to unleash his cranky fury on.

To get publicity for his new movie, Optimus Prime released a sex tape. Host Lou Berk has the dirt.

Did you see Simon Cowell roll his eyes at Chris Richardson during American Idol? According this video, Simon has a history of being a heartless bastard.

Farewell Anna Nicole Smith. As we take one last look back at your life we take comfort in the fact that although your soul may have shaken off this mortal coil your silicone filled boobies will be around for centuries.

LG new has assembled a collection of Rachel Ray’s most annoying moments to prove once and for all that some one really needs to slap that bitch.

Paris Hilton’s belongings! We’ve found’em! You’ll want them! And most all – you’ll want to have sex with them!