Diana Ross thought that no one would recognize her without makeup. Unfortunately an old woman died of a heart attack when she mistook Mrs. Ross for Death.

Further proof that a girl can never be skinny. Remember ladies, its not sexy unless your bones are protruding from your blouse.

Proof that the squirrel the in your backyard will do pretty much anything to steal food from your bird feeder.

Courtney Love is currently preparing for a zombie death match with Kurt over how she has ruined Nirvana's legacy one paycheck at a time.

This is proof that Ray Romano's show was a lie. Everybody does not love you and will proclaim that proudly with a tramp stamp.

Further proof that midgets have more talent than merely dressing up as munchkins and dancing around for that damned Judy Garland.

The vaudevillian tykes take on their arch-rivals in a joke battle to the death.

Fergie looks like the poster child for the Theory of Evolution. Who walks like this and what's with those curlers? Jesus!

This is funny to Germans as a re-dub of the Death Star Conference Room arguing about marketing. It’s funny to us because it sounds funny.

Celebrate the 30th anniversary of Elvis' death by watching him completely wasted on stage. He did not go out on top, in fact he went out on the crapper.

Anne Hathaway is proof that milk does a body good. However, sucking on your boyfriend's hairy nipple isn't a strong selling point.

Here's a gallery of how celebrities have aged over the years. One thing's certain: Death always wins!

Pop-schlock fake-punk Canadian Avril Lavigne is a hack, of course. Here's the proof! She totally ripped off Peaches.

Proof of reincarnation! Egads!

These emergency calls are hilarious! Except that now I've bled to death. Oh, can your taco save you now?

AP: Curtis Allgier stole a gun from a corrections officer and shot him to death Monday, when the prisoner was at a doctor's appointment in the University of Utah medical center. He was later captured at an Arby's.

He was shot in the back of the head. What a shame. Now the Sesame Street neighborhood Girl Scouts will never make enough money for their camping trip.

The Celebrity Proof Blackberry will protect celebrities who have the tendency to leave angry voicemails, film their own sex tapes, and snort a lot of drugs.

Bob Clark, the director of "Christmas Story," was killed yesterday morning by a drunk driver. Hollywood mourns.

DO NOT ACCUSE LOHAN OF DRUNK DRIVING. She will zap you.