God's Grindhouse

Pastor Dan is popular is a popular local preacher noted for adding pop culture references into his sermons.  Here is the sermon he delivered yesterday. 

 Well, well, well… it looks like we got a pretty good crowd today here in God’s house but from what I hear some folks are using this Easter Sunday to go to another kind of house.  A Grindhouse.  Well folks I’m not one of those old fuddy, duddy preachers.  I’m not going to condemn a film just cuase it has a little bit of sex… a little bit of violence.  In fact when I heard about this Grindhouse I got kind of excited.  Ya see it’s actually two movies for the price of one and one of those movies is called Death Proof.  And that’s all about this fella named Stunt Man Mike who can survive any car crash with his amazing death proof car.  “Well how about that” I said to my-self “he can over come death with a car”.  But then I thought to my-self “Wait a minute isn’t there another man I know of who overcame death.  But this man is even more amazing because this man didn’t need some fancy car.  No, he over came death all by himself, because of his own goodness, because of his own powers.  Why, a man like that makes ol’ Stunt Man Mike look not too impressive at all.”  Well do you know who that man was folks, do you know who it was?

 Optimus Prime.  Yes sir, Optimus Prime.  Glorious leader of the Autobots with the power to transform.  But you know folks, don’t we all know someone with the power to transform?  And I tell you what he doesn’t just transform into one thing like that old Optimus. He can transform lots of things.  He can transform one thing into a whole nother’ thing.  Do you know who that is folks?

 It’s Christian Bales character from the Prestige.  And that fella was kind of like Jesus.  So today my fellow Christians, when you exit this church, remember my sermon and if an IRS agent should approach you and ask why I’m writing off all my movie tickets you’ll know what to tell them.  That it was a legitimate business expense.  They were all legitimate business expenses!