HOLY FAT AMERICA BATMAN!

Hey, peoples. Just flipping through my trash mags here at rehab (yes, we have those things) and I just saw a picture of Ugly Betty at the Emmy Awards. Yes, indeed she does look rather good these days.

But did you know, my anorexic-obsessed readers, that Ugly Betty used to be fatter than she is now? Behold the Fatness of America Ferrera!

OH CHUBBINESS!

EXCUSE ME, HOLLYWOOD? How did you even let this girl into your shiny gates? How did she ever get a movie part looking like this? It's amazing that they even had a camera lens wide enough for her entire girth. Damn.

But look at it this way, she's skinnier now (not skinny, just skinnier) and now she's Ugly Betty. When little girls ask me advice on how to get into Hollywood, the first thing I say is lose some frickin' weight. Hollywood execs when to see colar bone and pelvic bone during an audition. It helps if you have boobs, but nothing is sexier to this execs than seeing a girls ribcage in all it's glory. Some might think this is disgusting, but look at all the marketing dollars being thrown to all those calvin klein ads you see everywhere.

skinny is always in. always. it's never going to go away. and sure, i might have bulked up a bit in the last year, but i'm never NEVER going back to my old eyes. stab my eyes out with a spatula if I ever become as fat as Ugly Better...before or after she was fat.........