Talk about almost becoming road kill.

The year is 2012 and the Kardashian family's giant boobs, butt, and stupidity have taken over the world. It's your job to put a stop to them.

Famous people who killed another person. A few obvious, more recent examples, but some that might surprise you (stick around for number 1.)

Tries to stalk and kill wheelchair man.

I'd kill anyone who did this to me.

I would kill to have access to this Slip-N-Slide.

Captures perfectly a child's fear of parently retaliation.

Amazing Portuguese equestrian bullfight (which means the bull is not killed.)

I would kill to have my dog be useful like this.

Luckily the owl is unharmed.

As some of you may have guessed, my thoughts on Christmas are a little conflicted. It's not like I have a vendetta against it like some people think. I mean, good for them. They managed to co-opt the solstice celebration. I'm not crazy about it, but it's not like I don't put up a tree and a few wreaths.

The thing that drives me nuts is the Santa Claus thing. Namely the notion that I invented Santa Claus to take the spotlight off Jesus during his birthday. Some say his name is "Santa" because it's just "Satan" with the "N" placed in front of the "T". I feel slightly insulted by the notion that I can turn into a serpent on a whim and tempt Eve out of paradise, but that when concocting a campaign to influence every Christian child in the world for hundreds of years I would just spell my name with a few letters switched around.

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