Paris attended the Jay-Z convertin Vegas this weekend, spending most of her time with her BACK to the stage! After his performance, the perpetually self-absorbed heiress jumped on stage and had the DJ play a couple of her songs so she could lip-sync along -- but she puked instead!

This was actually a Puma ad. The kid just likes Puma.

Clean up around the house, gentlemen, or your lady could end up dead.

The future of downloading porn is HERE, NOW!

Yeah. So you get to watch your football match, but now your hot girlfriend hates you. Nice job, retard.

What a responsible parent. I bet he rolls that kid's stroller into the bar, too.

Don't be distracted by the funny sign -- there's bears mating on the left!

"For the woman on the go."

Forget pads and tampons, you need to try the new iPad from Apple.

The Thanksgiving you learned about in school is 100% wrong. Take a look at how the first Thanksgiving really went down, starring everybody’s favorite Leprechaun.

Fruity Pebbles -- the cereal that turns the milk BLOOD RED!

This is the guy Miss Piggy cheated on Kermit with.

A cop convention finds the Reno County sherrif's department in Miami. Wackiness to ensue.

Watch the witty fat kid buy porn mags and booze with his fake IDs. These people are stupid.

The world's first fully-racist GPS system!

The Strangers with Candy movie trailer. Yeah, I didn't see this when it was in theaters, either.

The name is misleading -- it's a surprisingly hetero park.

The best-tasting cake you'll ever eat.

The Japanese are truly the greatest people on Earth!

The beginning of something magical is more like it.