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Top Model Pendulum Fail
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Bikini Girls Wash Pee-wee Herman's Car
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World's Biggest Killer Spider
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Who Farted?
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How To Cook A Turkey
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Celebrity Karaoke: John Mayer
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10 Sexiest Cinematic Bloodsuckers
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Pac-Man!
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10 Hints that Stewie is Gay
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Whoose Boobs: Super Boob Shuffle
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Metallica Figure Skating
If the men figure skating had fire, lighting and flying dragons, there would be more fans of this olympic sport.
You can use ChatRoulette for bingo playing, masturbating and now AWKWARD DATING. Yes, you can only video chat with somebody for so long until you need to be creeped out by each other in person. Recently our friends Chuck McCarthy and Will Hutson met a girl on CR and thought HEY, THIS IS EXCITING. So they met up with her at a local restaurant...who knows, pretty soon they might all be married. I dunno. Right now ChatRoulette Dating is classified as an extreme sport because it's just so new, and you have to be kind of crazy to do it. Or not be scared of STDs. I don't know what's floating around ChatRoulette these days so I really can't say. I haven't been there since Monday.
Anyway, check out this footage of Chuck and Will's date.
Just kidding! She's not fat at all! In fact, she's probably anorexic! Her name is Brooklyn Decker, and she's married to that tennis player Andy Roddick - that guy who looks like Stifler, who is that guy in American Pie who wants to bang your mom.
Some quick facts about Brooklyn, who we're thinking about stalking (because why not!).
-She's 22-years-old
-She's giving you major bone right now
-She's on Twitter - which means it's easy to find reasons why she might be really annoying. Like this reason:
But then we stop looking at her Twitter feed and stumble upon photos like this and realize that we can put up with annoying people, so long as they look like the hottest freaking girl in the world.
But then we remember we're not Andy Roddick, and we don't have six-pack abs and our name isn't something awesome like The Situation. We slowly realize we're totally never going to bang Brookly Decker. Then we cry. Then we go to Subway and order some fatass sandwich, not the healthy ones that Jared orders. Then we go home, cry some more while looking at ourself in the mirror and then turn on the computer to try and find naked pictures of Brooklyn Decker on the internet.
Eventually we end up like this:
Go ahead. Get your Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Issue fix right here.
You know when you get really drunk and high from huffing spray paint (gold) out of a paper bag (brown) and you and your friends come up with the most AMAZING idea? These are the greatest ideas, right? Right?
What do you think would happen if for some reason you had access to all the elements and ingredients to make your ideas reality... Yeah and your grandparents owned some sweatshops where 12-year-olds slaved away making socks for the British Premier League, so you have a big trust fund. Basically, you have infinite resources. What do you think would happen?
Yeah, besides the first ever monkey, marshmallow go-cart champion being crowned, (Mr. Chattlebanks), because that's awesome.
What would happen?
You would make some pretty awful stuff, stuff that would amaze people on one level and one level only. Yeah, the "why-the-F-did-this-ever-get-made-and-who-thought-that-this-was-a-good-idea-were-they-high-on-gold-spray-paint?" level. You got it!
Oh, you want an example of this kind of idea brought to fruition?
How about this video where an underage white girl runway model, Karlie Kloss, claims to be from St. Luis and then plays ping pong with Notorious Wally Green?
Did that illustrate my point? Did I have a point?
I guess my point is that money is no substitute for talent and true genius, and neither is gold... spray paint.
P.S. JD Ferguson directed the above video. Is he the greatest director of our time?
Disclaimer: I did no research whatsoever into how this video actually came about, and I know nothing about JD Ferguson.
Here is something from 2009 that didn't suck. Enjoy.
This got me to thinking about drugs, steroids, etc. The other day Mark McGwire admitted to juicing, and as this amazing animation illustrates all types of drugs have effected the game of baseball, and sports in general throughout the years.
I think that what needs to happen is that we need to stop trying to stop people from doing drugs, and just have all athletes admit what drugs they are on, have them listed like any other stats.
"Oh, I see here that the pitcher today is left handed and takes lithium and synthetic cat hormones."
How many basketball players smoke weed?
No really, how many? I thought you knew.
The point is that Doc Ellis was able to throw a No No on LSD and speed, but you give that same combination to Randy Johnson, and you might just see a little girl get her head ripped off... I'm not talking about a stray pitch either. I am talking about him walking over to the crowd and ripping a little girls head off because he thinks she is a bag of Doritos and The Big Unit loves Doritos... especially blonde Doritos.
We should just be told what these guys are operating on, so that we can fully appreciate their performances.
Did this make any sense? I'm a little F'd up on whippets right now... Got to get ready for my big ultimate frisbee game.
Chuck McCarthy is the mastermind behind IdeasByChuck.com, where he gives away great ideas in the hopes that you turn them into reality and remember to send him a small percentage of your profits. He Twitters here and Tumbls here. Chuck will be guest blogging for LiquidGeneration the next couple weeks!
Look. Yeah we're going to keep posting about Tiger Woods because that's the only thing on the news right now. So unless Jeff Goldblum dies in the next twenty minutes or we just fall alseep while writing this post, this is what you're stuck with so just deal.
So far there are SEVEN girls (or NINE, nobody really knows) who have come out and said they banged Tiger Woods. That's a lot of secret phone numbers to keep in your secret iPhone which will eventually make it's way onto the internet so that your secret sexy sext messages and nude pictures will be seen by the world! Respect!
In case you were wondering which of his mistresses is the hottest, we've got that taken care of for you. We're even going to add Elin to the mix because we're worried she'll be jealous (she's suffered enough!). This was a relatively easy task because the girls all have their own look. None of them really look the same. It seems that Tiger's only requirment for banging a girl was that she had a vagina - that's it! So here we go...
8. Florida waitress, Mindy Lawton. She looks like one of our alcoholic neighbors. "WUD YOU LIKKKE MEE TOOO SEDUSH UUUUUUUUUUU!"
7. Rachel Uchitel. This an old photo of her. In her new photos she looks like this, but more plastic. And less like her lips are made of liver.
6. Don't know what Tiger saw in Jaimee Grubbs. We guess it's kind of cool that she was in Tool Academy. Wait. No we don't. There is nothing redeaming about this chick besides her taste in short red clothes. Moving on.
5. Porn star Holly Sampson. Now we're talking. Now we understand why Tiger Woods would cheat on his wife: Elin obviously hated gay people. Holly Sampson supports gay people so much she's willing to wear a rainbow bikini on her boobs. That could be the only reason why he'd sleep with a porn star, right? RIGHT!?!
(click here to see the rest of the list)
10 Best Athletes Who Are Bad Sports
It's funny how certain athletes dominate in every aspect of their sport...except good sportsmanship. Check out this collection of death threats, sucker punches, and riots, to see for yourself.
Sex Face or Sports Face
We’re gonna show you a picture and you have to guess whether it’s a sports face or sex face. Don’t let this get you too excited. Your mom is in the other room.
Sports Bra Underwear
In this recession you have to save every penny. Even if it means wearing your crappy underwear as a sports bra.
2009 Sports Illusrated Swimsuit Issue - Bar Refaeli
Here's are some of the models in the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. As you can probably imagine, they are all horrendously hot.
2009 Sports Illusrated Swimsuit Issue
Here's are some of the models in the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. As you can probably imagine, they are all horrendously hot.
Liquid Generation has been corrupting the internet since 2000. We make funny, irreverent entertainment for web junkies and procrastinators of all types. From cartoons to videos, from games to online pranks, we do it all and we do it awesome.
Whenever you’re alone. Whenever you want to avoid work. Whenever you have no one to hug.
Liquid Generation is here to serve you.
We Love You,
Liquid Generation
P.S. You can write to us at talkback@liquidgeneration.com
We at Liquid Generation love it when friends, family, and personal enemies write to us with suggestions on how to make this website better. You should also feel free to email us if you find anything on the website that’s confusing, missing, spelled incorrectly, or just doesn’t work. We will promptly bring the wrongdoer out to the woods behind our office and shoot them to death.
However, if you just think that one of our animations, games or videos sucks, just keep those niceties to the comment section in each feature, loser.
You can email us at Talkback@liquidgeneration.com
Tyrese – Imperial Warlord
Tyrese Abdul Salaam Mohammad is Liquid Generation’s Imperial Warlord. Not much is known about His Excellency, except that he’s evaded numerous attempts on his life by the rival warlords that once roamed the dangerous streets in his hometown of Highland Park, IL. Now in California, Tyrese enjoys bonsai gardening and yo-yo dieting.
Email: tyrese@liquidgeneration.comSlippy Jenkins – Head Writer
Slippy Jenkins is the Head Writer at Liquid Generation. His responsibilities include the writing of things that are funny, as well as making sure that everything that goes up on Liquid Generation doesn’t suck. He and the LG creative team have been responsible for hundreds of popular cartoons, games and online tchotckies that have been seen by millions of people around the world and featured in the Chicago Sun-Times, Entertainment Weekly, Maxim Magazine, US Weekly, Defamer, Best Week Ever, G4TV, CNN, and one of his mother’s favorite “trash mags” Star Magazine, among others. He would like you to know that the previous sentence sounds really good when justifying his trade of penis & fart jokes to friends, family and potential girlfriends. Slippy Jenkins would also like you to know that his LG Sabotage screams are the direct result of pure talent and not of any vocal steroids, alcohol, street drugs, or other performance enhancers.
Slippy Jenkins currently lives in Los Angeles with his Roomba.
Email: slippyjenkins@liquidgeneration.comMonkey - Creative Director
Monkey began his illustrious career on the Internet by freelancing as a web designer. He was well known for creating some of the gaudiest self-serving Flash sites on all of the internets. He quickly joined the ranks of LG when they were headed in the direction of a Teen Portal. Soon after, Monkey and the other early members of LG realized that a Teen Portal was not the direction they should be going in, they should be making funny animations and games. Monkey’s illustration talents soon came into play and he began illustrating and animating for LG. Monkey soon realized that his years as a failed musician could also come in handy. He applied his talents to making LG’s famous PopToons -- the internet’s most sought after animated music videos starring celebrities. But, Monkey had another talent that his mother didn’t even tell him about: voiceover acting. Ever since he found out the he was one of the most talented voice actors to hit the “web stage,” he began doing most of the voices on the site, and continues to do so to this day. Monkey loves long walks on the beach, and bragging about his title of Liquid Generation’s own Creative Director.
Email: themonkey@liquidgeneration.comHelga Mohammed el-Salami – Chief Technology Officer
Helga Mohammed el-Salami, Secretary of Email Defense, Code Bitch, pre-operative transsexual.
Mr./Ms. el-Salami was an early convert to the Internet Revolution when, somewhere over a decade ago, he/she stole the source code from an early web page and boldly changed the header text. Since then, he/she has stolen code from tens of thousands of sources and appropriated it for Liquid Generation’s nefarious purposes. Some may have even been yours.
Several years ago, Mr./Ms. el-Salami had been charged with maintaining visitor satisfaction by serving as Liquid Generation’s email liaison. A job that, if judging by the volume of anger flowing through the mailroom, he/she has not been doing all that well
In his/her spare time, which we desperately try to minimize, Mr./Ms. el-Salami enjoys reading books and memorizing the Koran although he/she has had a hard time reconciling the teachings of the prophet with his/her desire to be the first trans-gendered lesbian. But regardless of his/her personal hurdles, Helga Mohammed el-Salami remains a soul seduced by the Internet’s romance. And its pornography.
Wimbledon Daily Hot: June 23rd
Ana Ivanovic defeated Rossana De los rios in straight sets 6-1, 6-2. She also looks nice in a sports bra. That's called win, win ladies and gentlemen.
Apologetic Rally Car Driver
He's apologizing for the effect his sport has on global warming, not his inability to control his car.
Fat Dudes Love Eva Herzigova
Although it's safe to say pretty much every dude with a Sports Illustrated subscription has "loved" Eva at some point.
Steeplechase Accident
Which is really the only thing that makes the event tolerable, oh and the puddles, those are cool; it's a sport with puddles, awesome!
Steeplechase Double Trouble
The steeplechase would be a nationally televised sporting event if this were guaranteed to happen every night.
A pole vaulter you say?
Those who remember Allison Stokke will be glad to meet Melanie Adams, who participates in a sport involving poles and is totally okay with being hot. She even intends to profit from it.