We totally would have thrown the girl over the railing. But that's just us.

We show you a picture of a person or pig with tattoos and you have to guess which it is. Pigs are sexy!

Just put a meat bone in her hand and Sarah Jessica Parker looks just as sexy as Dee Snider in Twisted Sister. Here she is on the set of the new Sex & The City 2, during a flashback of sorts to the 80s, when she was uglier.

Choose your favorite girls from the college movie student body.

Oh, little puppy! Aren't you glad you're not Paris Hilton's? Oh, yes you are! Oh yes you are!

Transformers + iPhones + Girls = Pure Cyber Sexiness

This girl is like Survivorman, but a lot more talented.

Nope, this is the scariest bass player ever!

Some might call this girl 'crazy' for liking the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles this much. We just think she's really...well, she's crazy.

This week Philip Norris defends a horny teacher’s right to sleep with one of his or her students. Sexy!

Yeah, Bikini Girl is hottish. She'd be just plain "hot" if we never saw her on American Idol and didn't know she was so stupid.

One man, especially one who is British, should never have so much power over a female. It's just unethical. Like, spread the wealth, dude. There are other guys who want girls to go crazy over them, too, ya know.

If you're even close to hot you should do what you can to get this costume and bring it to the Harry Potter premiere this week.

This Gossip Girl surely knows what to do to be famous: show your panties. Just like Britney, Xtina, and every other slutsicle, Taylor knows how to get our attention.

Talk about chubbing up. Lay off the Doritos and pick up the crystal meth!

Jerri Blank from Strangers with Candy is the one girl we would never, ever bang. Fun fact! Here are the 10 trashiest quotes from the cult show.

Michael Jackson is one of the most gifted badasses of our time. He’s also one of the sexiest. The way he picks up little boys…he’s just a smooth criminal.

We're suddenly turned on by the lazy, furry cat.

Nothing like a girl on girl fight to make a horrible movie watchable. And sexy!

These are the 10 sexiest animated women you'd bone in a heartbeat were it physically possible.