You know, there's nothing in the world we'd rather eat first thing in the morning than an Oreo cookie stuffed with about 20 billion Oreo cookies worth of frosty filling. JOKES! Really, we want to vomit. And because we're evil on the inside (not creamy!), we're posting this for you because we want you to vomit, too!

Cats look adorable, but somewhere in your heart of hearts you just know they are one of the most evil animals in the world. In fact, we'd even go so far as to say that cats are generally sneaky bastards who shouldn't be trusted with anything, especially young children. That said, we hope that this small child eventually ripped the heart out of this cat and ate it for dinner.

Over the years we've made A LOT of St. Patrick's Day cartoons featuring our favorite character The Angry Leprchaun. We even started using him for cartoons for other holidays because that's just how awesome he is - plus it's really hard to come up with good characters. He just works for everything  we want to do. And he's a drunk and drunks are always hilarious. Especially when they have Irish accents. So here's a smattering of Angry Leprechaun St. Patrick's Day e-cards and toons that you can send your friends today!

Note: Yes, the Leprechaun's drawing style and voice has changed over the years. That's what happens when you become more advanced and professional!

Don't Drink & Drive With The Angry Leprechaun - This one rawks. The Angry Leprechaun goes on a drunk driving rampage.

The Evil Leprechaun: Cabbage & Gravy - one of the first cartoons to feature the Angry Leprechaun. For some reason we called him "evil" back then.

St. Patrick's Day: A Girl From China - one of the more recent ones

Angry Leprechaun's Public Service Announcement - He does good things for the community.

The Evil Leprechaun: Lovely Lassie - Again, one of the first two Angry Leprechaun e-cards we've ever made.

Beer Before Liquor PSA - Another "More You Know" PSA...

Drink Responsibly - He sure did love doing these PSA. We wonder how many lives these things have saved?

St. Patricks' Day E-Card: My Darling - Send this too your loved one...

St. Patrick's Day Limmerick: A Good Looking Mommy - For the MILFs.

Enjoy!

Look, I'm not exactly sure how I feel about this, and yes, just like you, I think it's kinda creepy and weird, but I'm pretty sure Dakota Fanning and I are going to start dating soon.

I have never met D-Fan, but after reading her interview in M Magazine, I feel like I have known her my entire life, or at least her entire life. She likes arts and crafts like knitting, and I have an art degree. Plus, my mom likes to crochet, which is like knitting for people who you don't want to trust with two sharp metal objects. She is a cheerleader at her high school, and I went to high school. She is in the Twilight movie series, and I want to be in the last Twilight movie.

Okay, so those are all nice things to have in common, but you are probably saying to yourself, "Chuck, Dakota Fanning doesn't want to date you."

You're probably right. She probably doesn't want to date me.

GUESS WHAT. I don't want to date her either. I don't like blondes from No-Ho, and home schooled kids creep me out. I don't care if she isn't home schooled anymore (all information "dished" and "spilled" in the M Magazine article).

WE don't want to date each other, but...

...her parents, managers, agents, paparazzi, magazine publishers, Perez Hilton, and TMZ do (this is an curtailed list).

Everyone around her is itching for her to shed her little girl image and move into the role of leading lady sexpot. Just look at the latest cover of V Magazine. They are doing everything they can to turn her into the next Heather Graham. What do you think Hounddog was all about, or her playing an all powerful evil force to be reckoned with in the Twilight movies? But, it's just not working, and they are scrambling for options. Miley Cyrus has already pulled the showing a little skin for Vanity Fair stunt. She can't "accidently" send naked pictures of herself to the press like those other Disney girls, or do a porn like Paris Hilton, because she is still underage, and her parents could face some serious jail time for something like that.

What's left?

Dating an older man... a much older man. A man of mystery... Someone who would really have people asking why... no really, why?

Who is that man? Me.

If she started dating Josh Duhamel, Josh Hartnett, or even Josh Groban, people wouldn't be all that shocked or interested. They would be interested, and a little disturbed by the age difference, but Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise didn't catch that much scrutiny over their ages. They are both famous and good looking, but imagine what kind of media hell storm would erupt if I started dating Tom Cruise... I mean D-Fan.

Things I couldn't figure out how to work into this blog post but I really wanted to:

1.D-Fan once played a young Ellen Degeneress.

2. Dakota is next to Montana.

3. D-Fan might be a C-Fan someday, keep reading M Magazine for the scooped spilled dishes.

Chuck McCarthy is the mastermind behind IdeasByChuck.com, where he gives away great ideas in the hopes that you turn them into reality and remember to send him a small percentage of your profits. He Twitters here and Tumbls here. Chuck will be guest blogging for LiquidGeneration the next couple weeks!