Just like Photoshop cannot make Olivia Munn naked, Photoshop cannot totally make Britney Spears into the 20-year-old that most of us want to remember her as. Instead, we're left with Virtual Britney, a version of the popstar made by Candies, some clothing store for girls who will never look like Brintey. The photoshoppers tried to remove her cellulite, and we guess they were successfull. But sadly, they left us with something totally non-human. We prefer Britney's cottage-cheese infused ass to something that looks like it came straight out of Second Life.

(via Jezebel)

You know, we've never been a model before (because we're TOO GOOD-LOOKING), but we just know that if our only job in life was to look pretty and walk, we'd perfect the crap out of that. Really.  How hard is it to walk? Looking pretty you're born with, so that's in the bag. Walking - you do that since birth and to do it professionally should only take a few weeks, tops. That's why we don't understand when a model on a TV show fails miserable NOT ONCE but TWICE during her walk down the runway. She even takes a smack in the head by a swinging pendulum (wtf?). IT JUST MAKES US LOSE HOPE IN THE WORLD, YOU GUYS.

Over the years we've made A LOT of St. Patrick's Day cartoons featuring our favorite character The Angry Leprchaun. We even started using him for cartoons for other holidays because that's just how awesome he is - plus it's really hard to come up with good characters. He just works for everything  we want to do. And he's a drunk and drunks are always hilarious. Especially when they have Irish accents. So here's a smattering of Angry Leprechaun St. Patrick's Day e-cards and toons that you can send your friends today!

Note: Yes, the Leprechaun's drawing style and voice has changed over the years. That's what happens when you become more advanced and professional!

Don't Drink & Drive With The Angry Leprechaun - This one rawks. The Angry Leprechaun goes on a drunk driving rampage.

The Evil Leprechaun: Cabbage & Gravy - one of the first cartoons to feature the Angry Leprechaun. For some reason we called him "evil" back then.

St. Patrick's Day: A Girl From China - one of the more recent ones

Angry Leprechaun's Public Service Announcement - He does good things for the community.

The Evil Leprechaun: Lovely Lassie - Again, one of the first two Angry Leprechaun e-cards we've ever made.

Beer Before Liquor PSA - Another "More You Know" PSA...

Drink Responsibly - He sure did love doing these PSA. We wonder how many lives these things have saved?

St. Patricks' Day E-Card: My Darling - Send this too your loved one...

St. Patrick's Day Limmerick: A Good Looking Mommy - For the MILFs.

Enjoy!

Okay, everybody! It's that time again! We want you to dig real deep into your brain and ask yourself, WHO DO YOU THINK TURNED OUT HOTTER: Chastity Bono or Jennifer Aniston? This first picture is them in high school and the second is them now. Hmm. Don't worry, we're confused, too! Both of them have their pluses and minuses. We're gonna have to go to the bathroom with our laptop and see how our penis responds to this conundrum.

OR

American Apparel just ended their Best Bottom In The World contest; you can see the top three butts right here. There were over a thousand entries, and the winner will be flown to LA for a special photoshoot, but if their really lucky they'll probably be sexual harrassed by CEO Dov Charney (yippee!)!

This competition is a little crazy. I mean, forget about the Top 3 Best Butts...here are the Top 20. For the life of me I cannot figure out what is wrong with any of these or how one can be better than the other. They all look the same and by "same" I mean I would shoot a dozen puppies just to see them in person. Don't believe me? Just try it, ladies! Come to my office and see what will happen!

But what about the big time losers in this contest? Did anybody really submit a butt that wasn't attractive? I clicked my mouse over a hundred times to find out.

THE TOP 5 UGLIEST BUTTS IN THE WORLD

Now, there were a bunch of people with scores of zero. We're not going to count those because they probably entered the contest late and their butts are just too nice to be losers, so we suspect there is a glitch in The Matrix. We just took the lowest of the scores that weren't 0.0. Here's what we found.

5. Carlos. Score: 1.24

Why did they let dudes enter this contest? A major fail on the part of the organizers. Plus, his photo is in black & white. Fail on top of Fail.

4. Alisa. Score: 1.22

I'm not sure where the ass is on this lady, or if it's really a lady. It could be a dude like Carlos. I don't really want to investigate any further.

3. JL. Score: 1.21

Hairy legs! A Sure winner we tell you (maybe in Afghanistan)!

2. Shyla. Score: 1.19

Am I missing something? Where is this lady's butt? Did it fall off on her way to the meth lab? I really want to know as to avoid the town she live in.

And the #1 Ugliest Butt In The World....

1. Raggedy. Score: 1.17

There is no cottage cheese in this woman's butt. It's pure milkshake. 2%. And thank God she's wearing black underwear. We don't really want to know what's happening behind that bikini.

(via American Apparel's Best Bottom Contest)

You startup ChatRoulette because you want to have some sexy time and then BANG! You score! A real live women! Except...well, her privates are a little less than bangable.

Yes, this maze truly is unpossible! ("unpossible" is impossible squared). Can you get through it? If you can, why would you subject yourself to something like this? Do you have no life? Do you just really love mazes? Does this thing excite you? In the horny way? Because that's the only reason why we'd imagine somebody taking this maze: it gets them horny. Or they're just a big nerd!

Because why, if you're seriously trying to figure this whole Global Warming thing out, why wouldn't you trust a guy WHO'S JOB IT IS TO FIGURE OUT ALL THINGS WEATHER RELATED. We grew up thinking that Weathermen - or Meteorologists - were the experts on weather, not Al Gore (no offense, Al!). But when a dude acts like he's all coked up on cocaine and you know he's the type of guy who just goes home and punches through walls, and maybe small children, well, how can you take that seriously? How can you take a guy like this seriously? FOR REAL THIS GUY IS WEATHERMAN NOT A PRETEND WRESTLER. 

What's the deal with weathermen? They are like the Ed Hardy of the nightly news world. Total d-bags. A quick search throught the LiquidGeneration archives show you that if you've failed at life you're most likely a weatherman for the 11 o'clock news. We imagine most weathermen (oh sorry, meteorologists!) are sad, alcoholic cocaine addicted wife beaters for some reason. We have nothing to back this up, it's just a feeling we have (intuition, bitches!).  Anyway, another weatherman was acting like a complete asshat recently and we thought you'd like to know about it. He talks about his pee pee.

The briliant, hipster-y (and annoying!) people at American Apparel are holding one of the greatest contests ever in the history of contests. They are searching for the Best Bottom In The World. You submit a picture of your ass and people vote on it. There's a gallery, a gallery that you can spend the whole night browsing. Really. We got no work done today because all we could do is just flip, flip, flip and fap, fap, fap through the pages of the contest. No, we're not losers. We just appreciate the good things in life. Like BUTTS. Check it out.

Truth is, this spider is a REAL A-HOLE. Who does this? "Oh I'm gonna crawl on the ceiling and then scare a poor old man! My name is Spider and I'm so cool! Look at me guys, look at me"

Stupid spiders. I hate you.

Some of you may know that besides writing blog posts about teen superstars and my eventual relationship with Dakota Fanning, I am also a screenwriter. I have written four feature screenplays, and of course, like 99% of all screenwriters, no one has even ever volunteered to read one of my scripts, much less produce it or air it a global television network (not even Spike).

Now, I wouldn't call any of my scripts works of total genius. They have mostly been exercises in futility with the hope of honing a skill that I can later sell to other poor schmucks that think that their story is worth seeing brought to life by Zach Efron and Suri Cruise (Silly Saturday rated PG for simulated farting noises). This said, I do think that all of my scripts are entertaining, and are better, more interesting than something say... A MONKEY COULD PUT TOGETHER! But I guess some "chaps," or more so, some "chimps,"  over at the BBC would disagree.

Apparently some chimpanzees have made a movie, and the BBC is going to air it despite a very weak plot line, worse cinematography than "Death Proof," and a total and blatant disregard for a hundred years of film making. Breaking the rules is something every aspiring filmmaker should try, but you have to understand the rules you are breaking to be groundbreaking.

Of course, just like James Cameron's Avatar, people are going to ignore all these flaws because of the fact that the chimps were using a new and special "chimp-proof camera" camera or "chimpcam." So what?! I've got a "chimp-proof camera." It's called a Flip HD.

Where can I go from here? I have hit rock bottom. I will never amount to anything. Maybe I should just start writing my outlines and treatments with my own poop.

Seriously, guys, chimps, bros, I'd love to work with you guys. I really respect your work and I have an outline for a ten movie series about a monkey named HAX. The whole thing is very high concept, so I can't say anything else without a deal in place. You love bananas. I love bananas. We could run this town. It's gonna be... bananas. Oh yeah, I definitely think we can get Gwen Stefani on board to do the soundtrack... yeah, and Ryan Gosling has already expressed interest.

"Take your stinking paws off my film industry, you damn dirty chimps!"  -Chuck McCarthy

Chuck McCarthy is the mastermind behind IdeasByChuck.com, where he gives away great ideas in the hopes that you turn them into reality and remember to send him a small percentage of your profits. He Twitters here and Tumbls here. Chuck will be guest blogging for LiquidGeneration today! 

Glen Bell, the founder of both Taco Bell and Wienerschnitzel, died on Saturday at the age of 86.

I know that this news has deeply effected several of my friends... one friend in particular... When my friends are sad, I get sad, so I am... sad.

I got sadder just now, when I went to the Taco Bell and Wienerschnitzel websites and discovered that neither had made any kind of move to honor or even acknowledge the passing of the man who gave them life, the man who gave their taste flavor combinations to the world.

So, I urge all of you to post these commemorative Glen Bell is dead, death logos on your own websites, blogs, and Friendster pages to honor his last... run for the boarder.

Here is a list of fun facts about Glen Bell that I put together, so you can share when people ask why they should care.

1. He FOUNDED Taco Bell. What else do you want?

2. He co-founded Wienerschnitzel. They have a new Coney Island Dog.

3. He divorced his first wife Dorothy because she didn't like Mexican food.

4. While in the marines he loved food so much that he was assigned to be a waiter.

5. A former employee of his at Taco Bell founded Del Taco. Yeah! This guy is directly responsible for Del Taco too!

6. He looked great in a sombrero.

Let me paint a picture of a man-boy, a legend in the making. This man-boy lives in the woods of the great northwest - Jack London territory - Twilight territory - Kurt Cobain land... you know, like around Seattle.

He lives like a James Bond-Goldilocks, sneaking into people's houses, stealing planes (he learned to fly from video games), stealing speedboats, using night vision goggles to hunt and live off the land, and supplementing his diet with pizza that he has delivered to the woods. Not too hot -not too cold - extra cheese and just right.

The painting of this legend gets bolder, more intricate with every detail, with every stroke of the brush, and I'm not done stroking.

Like Yogi Bear he doesn't wear shoes while snagging "pic-a-nic" baskets, but he isn't stopping at sandwiches, and Park Ranger Smith isn't the only one he is outsmarting. The police and FBI are hot on his trail for over 50 alleged burglaries. Did I mention that he likes to take "cheeky" pictures of himself with victims' digital cameras (in my book this means pictures of his penis wearing sunglasses)?

Who is this man-boy, this 18yr old legend in the making?

Have you heard of Colton Harris-Moore?  You just did. Oh, and Jason Bourne... GFY!

Watch the video below, and read these articles to find out more.

Now that you are on Team CHM (Facebook Fanpage alert!) and love him more than Jacob Black, would you pre-order a copy of his video game?

What would you call his video game?

What would you call his movie?

Do you think that Mercedes should be paying him for his endorsement?

Chuck McCarthy is the mastermind behind IdeasByChuck.com, where he gives away great ideas in the hopes that you turn them into reality and remember to send him a small percentage of your profits. He Twitters here and Tumbls here. Chuck will be guest blogging for LiquidGeneration the next couple weeks!

Very rarely do I ever have any serious desire to meet celebrities. This is partly because, like I pointed out before, I am pretty out of touch with pop culture, and partly because I have met a bunch of celebrities. Most of the time, they are very disappointing - douches.

Sitting here in my coffice (coffee shop + office) next to the Gaming Club (they play board games here twice a week) I don't feel too Hollywood, though I guess I am... since I live in Hollywood. But, I didn't move out here because it was my dream to hang out with Paris Hilton or pal around with Wilmer "Yo Mama" Valderama. These Gaming Club guys can get a little rowdy, but I can tell you from experience, they are much less annoying to be in the same room with than the Valderama.

This said, I have to admit that every once in a while I hear enough about a famous person that I actually want to meet them, to see what they are really like.

I have been feeling this way about Lady Gaga for a while now for a couple of reasons. First, she kind of reminds me of my week long high school ex-girlfriend Larkin Grimm (a weirdo musician in her own right) and a couple of other girl friends (friends that are girls). This feeling of familiarity is all about her general craziness and desire to dress to impress or offend. Second, she kind of looks like my old boss Suzie from Liberty Curio, a junk shop that I worked at selling junk on Ebay and Craigslist.

Recently (30 minutes ago after I read her Wikipedia entry), I started to feel a desire to meet Ke$ha too. I don't know how much of her Wikipedia entry is true, but she had me at "breaking into Prince's house." Anyone crazy enough to enter Prince's domain uninvited... wow. Throwing up in Paris Hilton's closet is pretty cool too. Plus, she is hot, really hot, and like me and Lady Gaga, she likes to hang out in her undies.

I know I said I don't like blondes in my post about Chuckota (super celebrity couple Chuck McCarthy and Dakota Fanning), but I am pretty sure that neither Ke$ha nor Lady Gaga are real blondes. Moreover, I just want to meet them, get to know them. Dating is a long way down the road. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. I might hate both of them in real life.

Anyway, I decided that I am going to try to meet and hang out with Lady Gaga and Ke$ha. This is where living in Hollywood comes in handy. I am fairly confident that I can track them down. Los Angeles is big, but not that big.

I already found both of their Myspace profiles, and friended them. I hope they accept. Lady Gaga was online when I sent her the request, so maybe she will get back to me soon!

Let me know if you have any advice... or if you are Ke$ha or Lady Gaga, let's hang.

Look, I'm not exactly sure how I feel about this, and yes, just like you, I think it's kinda creepy and weird, but I'm pretty sure Dakota Fanning and I are going to start dating soon.

I have never met D-Fan, but after reading her interview in M Magazine, I feel like I have known her my entire life, or at least her entire life. She likes arts and crafts like knitting, and I have an art degree. Plus, my mom likes to crochet, which is like knitting for people who you don't want to trust with two sharp metal objects. She is a cheerleader at her high school, and I went to high school. She is in the Twilight movie series, and I want to be in the last Twilight movie.

Okay, so those are all nice things to have in common, but you are probably saying to yourself, "Chuck, Dakota Fanning doesn't want to date you."

You're probably right. She probably doesn't want to date me.

GUESS WHAT. I don't want to date her either. I don't like blondes from No-Ho, and home schooled kids creep me out. I don't care if she isn't home schooled anymore (all information "dished" and "spilled" in the M Magazine article).

WE don't want to date each other, but...

...her parents, managers, agents, paparazzi, magazine publishers, Perez Hilton, and TMZ do (this is an curtailed list).

Everyone around her is itching for her to shed her little girl image and move into the role of leading lady sexpot. Just look at the latest cover of V Magazine. They are doing everything they can to turn her into the next Heather Graham. What do you think Hounddog was all about, or her playing an all powerful evil force to be reckoned with in the Twilight movies? But, it's just not working, and they are scrambling for options. Miley Cyrus has already pulled the showing a little skin for Vanity Fair stunt. She can't "accidently" send naked pictures of herself to the press like those other Disney girls, or do a porn like Paris Hilton, because she is still underage, and her parents could face some serious jail time for something like that.

What's left?

Dating an older man... a much older man. A man of mystery... Someone who would really have people asking why... no really, why?

Who is that man? Me.

If she started dating Josh Duhamel, Josh Hartnett, or even Josh Groban, people wouldn't be all that shocked or interested. They would be interested, and a little disturbed by the age difference, but Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise didn't catch that much scrutiny over their ages. They are both famous and good looking, but imagine what kind of media hell storm would erupt if I started dating Tom Cruise... I mean D-Fan.

Things I couldn't figure out how to work into this blog post but I really wanted to:

1.D-Fan once played a young Ellen Degeneress.

2. Dakota is next to Montana.

3. D-Fan might be a C-Fan someday, keep reading M Magazine for the scooped spilled dishes.

Chuck McCarthy is the mastermind behind IdeasByChuck.com, where he gives away great ideas in the hopes that you turn them into reality and remember to send him a small percentage of your profits. He Twitters here and Tumbls here. Chuck will be guest blogging for LiquidGeneration the next couple weeks!

Question 1:  Is this a real photo or a still from the soon to be released hit sequel event of the summer, Coming To America Too, starring Tyler Perry?

Question 2:  Is this a real world leader or some sort of Epcot Center exhibit?

Question 3:  Do you know who this is?

Click here for the answers!