Even a carton bully laughs at you, Paris.

When the judge's decision to send Paris back to prison is read, an unseen man cries out in obvious agony. Will celebrity justice never be served??

Paris is getting hauled off *BACK* to Lynwood today! Are you ecstatic or sad?

This morning (June 8, 2007) Paris Hilton was cuffed and taken by squad car after a judge has ordered her back in court.... and back to JAIL!!

Perhaps representing the height of celebrity mugshots, Paris proves she's always herself by posing her ass off for the cops. Nice.

Paris Hilton's wax figure got outfitted in prison stripes... good thing stripes are in this season!!

Sarah Silverman gave the Hilton heiress a good grilling last night at the MTV Movie Awards... Paris was hardly spared, and her face totally shows it! God, I want to hump you, Sarah!

Paris doesn't need a bra for support, when she's got God and the good book on her side!

She's like a 13-year-old girl who cuts out words and pictures from tampon ads in women's magazines to express her emotions. God she's stupid.

Watch Paris Hilton in jail right now! It's live! It's boring! It's a great way to spend the afternoon!

Check out this weird commercial of a lawyer advertising on TV that he wants only one client: Paris Hilton.

Paris is getting into shape before prison, and luckily for us man-lovers, her trainer is SUPER hot!!

Britney, Paris, Lindsay and Tara Reid are back and this time they're defending NYC with their Spidey-senses!

While the paparazzi chased Paris as SHE was driving in her Bentley, they caught a glimpse into her window, texting Paris Latsis that she'd 'come by' after her lawyer meeting. She's gettin' some from a dude before she has to give it up to her bull-dyke cellmates!

The paps were hot on Paris Hilton's heels yesterday as she drove HERSELF to a lawyer meeting, after previously getting rides from mom Kathy. Paris, you're bad!

Watch a simulation of Paris Hilton's soon-to-come behind-bars sexcapades!

Paris Hilton constantly inspires art. That's why someone made a wax rendition of her in the middle of a suicide attempt. That won't get you out of prison, Paris!!

Even the wind is against Ms. Hilton as she leaves a courthouse appearance. Remember, Paris, behind bars you only get two pairs of undies per week!

Paris Hilton got sentenced to 45 days in jail! YAY!!!!

When you're so famous that people hire look-alikes to show up naked at parties... that's pretty darn famous.