Blake Lively in a bikini is proof positive that Gossip Girl needs to be set somewhere tropical if we're ever going to watch. Oh, and Hi Maria Menounos!

Almost forgot about you, how are you doing? Wearing sweatpants, smoking cigarettes, and showing a little bump, good to see you're staying the course.

Which is really the only thing that makes the event tolerable, oh and the puddles, those are cool; it's a sport with puddles, awesome!

Thought meth made you skinny and scabby, not fat and flabby, oh well, still sucks to be you.

In this edition, oh we so horny for all the hot Asian celebrities in Hollywood.

Oh, those kids, they sure know how to pose for a candid, uncontroversial photo...

"See guys, a girl! Her name's Sophie Monk and her bangin' body is all mine!...why aren't we touching? oh you missed that, i was hetero-ing all over her inside."

ADSjopojSDIOJlkdlkjdaop....oh sorry, had to turn off my Hawaii Chair to type, but my abs are looking great!

Pretty sure the "Oh well I'm just a ditzy blonde" excuse doesn't apply to smoking meth out of a light bulb but it's worth a shot!

Victoria let some of her pit boob escape it's cold and frigid prison. It looks like a sack of fat… Oh wait…

Maybe I don't want to die... I am just going to call this number here and maybe someone will tell me how important and loved I am… oh… well…never mind.

The Dalorean is coming back on the market and who wouldn’t want to outfit their new car with a Flux Capacitor!? Oh yeah, us poor people.

Creepy and ominous. Let's all agree not to shower anymore. Oh… some of us apparently made that decision years ago.

Oh really? You stopped taking food stamps? Gawd, this isn't fair! Whose is gonna keep my buns warm now? Huh? HUH!?

Don’t worry kids, it's just your father. Pretend that you're scared though, it will really make land sharks day.

Oh Paris, that stunning shade of "Recently gave a blow job" red really accents your smile… and the fact that you're an idiot.

Jewel looks like she has had a boob job, but instead of silicone, the doctor dropped in a large clump of playdoh. Oh well, anything to distract from the teeth.

"So how is that rocking acting career coming along? Oh yeah, really? Umm yeah, you know what, I will have the Steak, thanks".

What are the chances that a football player would come barreling down the sidelines? Actually pretty good, but the odds of another cameraman catching your "oh crap" face… that’s just gold.

This would truly be the act of a national hero. Oh, if only someone had the balls.