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FRIENDS AND LOVERS
I have heard so much about the new Mac Tablet that I almost want to get one myself... even though they supposedly don't exist, and if they do, no one has ever seen one, besides Willy Wonka... uhh, I mean Steve Jobs and his Oompa-Loompas.
So much speculation has gone into what these magical tablets are going to look like and what they are going to do, and yet no one has thought about how these new devices are going to affect the way we see celebrities.
Lucky for you guys, I know a thing or two about magic too, Photoshop magic. Using my Photoshop magic I was able to whip up some images of what we all have to look forward to from some of your favorite celebs once the Mac Tablet flies into Apple stores via the glass elevator.
Before the Mac Tablet, Victoria Beckham's son had to use his drawing pad to cover his mum's face from the paparazzi, but with the Mac Tablet, he won't have to worry about messing up his drawings.
Before the Mac Tablet, Lindsay Lohan's life was spiraling out of control, and she had to cover her face with tie-died clutch handbags, but the Mac Tablet is going to change all that. By the time the Mac Tablet hits stores, no one will even want to take pictures of her.
Before the Mac Tablet, Pete Wentz was kind of a playful d-bag. When the Mac Tablet comes out, Ashley Simpson still won't be able to sing, but he will be an even more playful d-bag, even more overly impressed by his own cleverness and long eyelashes.
P.S. - Expect someone like Rob Zombie or Robin Williams to show up on the VMA's dressed like Moses and carrying two Mac Tablets with the twelve commandments (possibly of rock and roll). Trust me.
Sincerely,
Charles McCarthy
IdeasbyChuck.com
Furniture Store for Black & White People
Finally, Martin Luther King's dream of having a furniture for both white and b lack people has become a reality.
Thinspiration: Steve Martin
Nothing helps you lose weight faster than looking at pictures of celebrities in the best and worst moments.
Gwyneth's Goth-me Boots
The uncomfortable boots with bondage straps look is so last year, although Chris Martin is probably into that stuff.
Michael Jordan vs. The Sheens
In what is most likely "the greatest athletic competition you never knew existed", Martin & Charlie Sheen play basketball against Michael Jordan way back in 1988.
Vin Diesel's Coffee Haus
Have a cup of coffee with Vin Diesel and his band of cracked-out celebrity friends like Leonardo Di Caprio, Martin Scorsese, Julia Roberts and more!
Skin Head Mug Shot
Curtis Allgier's face and neck tattoos include various decorative swasticas, "skin head" or his brow, F.U.N. on his chin, SS bolts on his cheeks, a crucifix, "Property of Jolene" on his forehead, a Doc Martin boot on his nose, and the "Hatebreed" logo above his mouth.
Famous Babies
Watch Suri Cruise, Sean Preston Spears, Moses Paltrow and Baby Bradgenlina in this parody of everybody’s favorite Saturday morning cartoon, The Muppet Babies.
E!vacuation: Seacrest Out!
The E! Entertainment Television building got a bomb threat this morning, but luckily Ryan Seacrest got out alive! (With his Aston Martin.)
OSCARS '07: Clint Eastwood's Crotch
Clint Eastwood's wife "grabbed" his crotch during Martin Scorcese's acceptance speech. Awkward!!
Demetri Martin. Art.
Demetri Martin is a funny person. You may know him from the Daily Show, but now you can know him from his Comedy Central special. Here's a clip.
What's In a Stupid Name?
What’s with Tom Cruise naming his Scientology baby Suri? How about Gwyneth Paltrow’s baby, Moses? Why do celebrities insist on naming their babies such stupid names?