Ah celebrities. They are always trainwrecking their lives away. They never seem to not get drunk, snort blow of a hooker and then punch people in the face. THEY ARE ALWAYS DOING THE CRAZY, as someone with broken English might say. Well, this is our salute to them.

No, it's not you idiot. Just because it's Monday doesn't mean you have to get all wacky. This is the real and next iPhone.

Also! We'd hate to be the poor bastard at Apple who lost this guy. HAPPY MONDAY, GUY WHO DOESN'T HAVE A JOB AT APPLE ANYMORE!

April Fool's Day is amateaur hour, but that doesn't mean you should sit this one out. Everybody knows at least one sucker. Here are a few of our favorite Sabotages to help you in your April 1st pranks.

Spanish Castle Illusion

Watch Out For Strangers

Your Friend Is A Facebook Slut

Color Vision Deficiency

Slow Motion Boob Flasher

Are You Going To Heaven or Hell?

Online Huntin

Have you ever had your happiness destroyed by a single sentance? Yes, we all have! That's why, as we watch this clip, we are filled with tears and frowns. We feel for this kid. We were this kid. We understand this kid.

Although we'd never be so gay as to sing Beyonce. I mean, WTF!?!

There's a brilliant series of interviews with John Cusack on YouTube about writer Hunter S. Thompson. You really learn a lot about the drunken writer! Really! However, there happens to be one videos about Hunter that's better than almost every other video about Hunter and it's not even about Hunter! The video features Gary "The Teeth" Busey trying to talk about Hunter S. Thompson, but the interviewer isn't getting the directing of ther interview right, so Gary helps him out. And by "helps him out" I mean "act really crazy."

Also, this is the best comeback ever.

Recently during the SXSW music festival, Ghostbuster Bill Murray took command of the Shangra-La's bar and started serving people dranks. We can't help but notice that he looked pretty tipsy, which is nothing knew if you take into account the below videos.

But first, here's Bill pouring shots at the Austin bar Shangra-La.

And then here's him drunk in Rushmore.

Oh...then there's that Suntory Whiskey commercial in Lost In Translation. He got pretty wasted filming that, remember?

Finally, not too long ago Bill Murray was arrested in Sweden for driving a golf cart...while intoxicated. No video footage of this exists, though somebody did make a confusing Machinema video of the incident. We don't really understand it, but it's on the internet so it must be funny! Or something.

Look, we're not saying Bill Murray is an alcoholic or anything. We're just saying he really, really must like alcohol.

In case you haven't already heard a million girls crying out loud "TRUE LOVE DOES NOT EXIST" then you should probably know that Sandra Bullock's husband, Jesse James, probably cheated with on her this tattooed chick pictured below. Here name is "Michaell Bombshell" McGee (as opposed to just "Tits McGee"). This is disappointing to say the least. WE ACTUALLY LIKE SANDRA! But we're also conflicted because we REALLY LIKE TATTOOS. Maybe Sandra should have just gotten tattoos because they kinda look similar? Maybe? Not really? Ugh, we don't know we're just going to go to lunch now and get drunk with Irish people.

Here's Bombshell's Twitter.

Her website.

Become a fan of hers on Facebook!

Over the years we've made A LOT of St. Patrick's Day cartoons featuring our favorite character The Angry Leprchaun. We even started using him for cartoons for other holidays because that's just how awesome he is - plus it's really hard to come up with good characters. He just works for everything  we want to do. And he's a drunk and drunks are always hilarious. Especially when they have Irish accents. So here's a smattering of Angry Leprechaun St. Patrick's Day e-cards and toons that you can send your friends today!

Note: Yes, the Leprechaun's drawing style and voice has changed over the years. That's what happens when you become more advanced and professional!

Don't Drink & Drive With The Angry Leprechaun - This one rawks. The Angry Leprechaun goes on a drunk driving rampage.

The Evil Leprechaun: Cabbage & Gravy - one of the first cartoons to feature the Angry Leprechaun. For some reason we called him "evil" back then.

St. Patrick's Day: A Girl From China - one of the more recent ones

Angry Leprechaun's Public Service Announcement - He does good things for the community.

The Evil Leprechaun: Lovely Lassie - Again, one of the first two Angry Leprechaun e-cards we've ever made.

Beer Before Liquor PSA - Another "More You Know" PSA...

Drink Responsibly - He sure did love doing these PSA. We wonder how many lives these things have saved?

St. Patricks' Day E-Card: My Darling - Send this too your loved one...

St. Patrick's Day Limmerick: A Good Looking Mommy - For the MILFs.

Enjoy!

Jesus Christ, Val Kilmer. Not only are you a huge fatass you're beginning to look like a lesbian, too. How many Pizza Huts have you eaten in the last 20 years (and we mean the Pizza Hut buildings, not slices of pizza). You should be appearing on the Celebrity Fit Camp and try your best not to hide any of the other contestants under your fat rolls so that you can win.

Because we're legally required to blog about Christina Hendricks every time we run into her on the internet, the Unreality website has blogged the 15 Best Pictures of Christina Hendricks. Now, these are just the best photots, it doesn't mean these are the ONLY photos. So if you were looking for something to do this afternoon, you can always find the best 30 or 50  or 100 pictures of Christina Hendricks if you really wanted to. The internet is not going to stop. But go here if you just want the best 15.

Somebody on the internet said these two were from The Today Show, but we don't bleieve them because they look funny, and by "look funny" we mean they talk weird. Anyway, if you have a morning show you shouldn't be playing with your Wii this hard. It's just awkward.

American Apparel just ended their Best Bottom In The World contest; you can see the top three butts right here. There were over a thousand entries, and the winner will be flown to LA for a special photoshoot, but if their really lucky they'll probably be sexual harrassed by CEO Dov Charney (yippee!)!

This competition is a little crazy. I mean, forget about the Top 3 Best Butts...here are the Top 20. For the life of me I cannot figure out what is wrong with any of these or how one can be better than the other. They all look the same and by "same" I mean I would shoot a dozen puppies just to see them in person. Don't believe me? Just try it, ladies! Come to my office and see what will happen!

But what about the big time losers in this contest? Did anybody really submit a butt that wasn't attractive? I clicked my mouse over a hundred times to find out.

THE TOP 5 UGLIEST BUTTS IN THE WORLD

Now, there were a bunch of people with scores of zero. We're not going to count those because they probably entered the contest late and their butts are just too nice to be losers, so we suspect there is a glitch in The Matrix. We just took the lowest of the scores that weren't 0.0. Here's what we found.

5. Carlos. Score: 1.24

Why did they let dudes enter this contest? A major fail on the part of the organizers. Plus, his photo is in black & white. Fail on top of Fail.

4. Alisa. Score: 1.22

I'm not sure where the ass is on this lady, or if it's really a lady. It could be a dude like Carlos. I don't really want to investigate any further.

3. JL. Score: 1.21

Hairy legs! A Sure winner we tell you (maybe in Afghanistan)!

2. Shyla. Score: 1.19

Am I missing something? Where is this lady's butt? Did it fall off on her way to the meth lab? I really want to know as to avoid the town she live in.

And the #1 Ugliest Butt In The World....

1. Raggedy. Score: 1.17

There is no cottage cheese in this woman's butt. It's pure milkshake. 2%. And thank God she's wearing black underwear. We don't really want to know what's happening behind that bikini.

(via American Apparel's Best Bottom Contest)

Even though she's 99% hair, we find ourselves suddenly turned on by Kate Gosselin. Like freakishly so. She appeared on the Jimmy Kimmel Show last night, and damn if we didn't have to drop the remote and run to the bathroom for some "me time, and I don't mean pee time" right there. For serious!

And look at those cans. Does she have breast implants? Sorry if we sound overly excited here, friends. When 20 babies fall out of a women's vagina, we tend to never think about her again. But Kate, you've redeemed yourself. MILF Status 3000.

Just kidding! She's not fat at all! In fact, she's probably anorexic! Her name is Brooklyn Decker, and she's married to that tennis player Andy Roddick - that guy who looks like Stifler, who is that guy in American Pie who wants to bang your mom.

Some quick facts about Brooklyn, who we're thinking about stalking (because why not!).

-She's 22-years-old

-She's giving you major bone right now

-She's on Twitter - which means it's easy to find reasons why she might be really annoying. Like this reason:

But then we stop looking at her Twitter feed and stumble upon photos like this and realize that we can put up with annoying people, so long as they look like the hottest freaking girl in the world.

But then we remember we're not Andy Roddick, and we don't have six-pack abs and our name isn't something awesome like The Situation. We slowly realize we're totally never going to bang Brookly Decker. Then we cry. Then we go to Subway and order some fatass sandwich, not the healthy ones that Jared orders. Then we go home, cry some more while looking at ourself in the mirror and then turn on the computer to try and find naked pictures of Brooklyn Decker on the internet.

Eventually we end up like this:

Go ahead. Get your Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Issue fix right here.

Dude, what a dick move. All these drunkies wanted to do was take a little cinnamon challenge and the guy filming this had to replace one of their table spoons of cinnamon with cayenne pepper. RETRIBUTION, it will be the hotties.

Hello. My name is David Portado and I'm in love with Snooki. I'm also one of the illustrators at LiquidGeneration. Excuse how illiterate I am.

Early on in The Jersey Shore, we found out that none of the Shore girls were shy, especially my favorite 4 foot 9 inches guidette Snooki, who tried to hook up with every guy on the show. Yesterday RadarOnline.com reported that there may be a Snooki Sex Tape or nude pictures on the loose. Thankfully!  However, Snooki took to Twitter to deny the pics and vid exist: "Like i said before about my supposed 'sex tape'...There are no nude pictures nor will there ever be. the tabloids just love snook gossip ;]"

MTV just gave the boobalicious cart-wheel-showing vagigi and the rest of the Jersey Shore crew members a new season, with 12 new episodes to shoot in the winter which will air sometime this summer. So get ready for more fist pumping, sex, and drunken bar fights! The whereabouts to where they're going to tape it is still unknown, but I'm sure it's going to be someplace warm like LA so I can molest Snooki.

The cast of Jersey shore is here in LA taping the Leno and Ellen show so we have set up a trap to capture her and tape her sucking her favorite thing, a big fat juicy pickle!

Now that's a snookuation!

Stay tune in case we end up capturing her. In the mean time, you can find out How Jersey Shore Are You? by taking the quiz.

So here at LiquidGeneration, we kind of have an open porn policy when it comes to looking at dirty things on the internet. I mean, somebody has to find the boobs for Whoose Boobs, and sometimes when browsing the interwebs for breasteses, you run into naked things, and sometimes those naked things are doing wrong things. Very wrong things. But! LG isn't your normal work environment. Most of you are sitting in a cubicle right now pretending to work on really serious things. We feel sorry for you. In fact, some of you are so bored that you're looking at naked things on the internet, and that's ok! Really! As long as you don't get caught by your boss or the HR department. Or if you don't get caught on national TV like a total asshat, like this guy.

Update: Apparently this guy is on leave this week from work. He might be fired, you guys! There's already an online campaign to save his job.

I have heard so much about the new Mac Tablet that I almost want to get one myself... even though they supposedly don't exist, and if they do, no one has ever seen one, besides Willy Wonka... uhh, I mean Steve Jobs and his Oompa-Loompas.

So much speculation has gone into what these magical tablets are going to look like and what they are going to do, and yet no one has thought about how these new devices are going to affect the way we see celebrities.

Lucky for you guys, I know a thing or two about magic too, Photoshop magic. Using my Photoshop magic I was able to whip up some images of what we all have to look forward to from some of your favorite celebs once the Mac Tablet flies into Apple stores via the glass elevator.

Before the Mac Tablet, Pete Wentz was kind of a playful d-bag. When the Mac Tablet comes out, Ashley Simpson still won't be able to sing, but he will be an even more playful d-bag, even more overly impressed by his own cleverness and long eyelashes.

P.S. - Expect someone like Rob Zombie or Robin Williams to show up on the VMA's dressed like Moses and carrying two Mac Tablets with the twelve commandments (possibly of rock and roll). Trust me. 

Sincerely,

Charles McCarthy
IdeasbyChuck.com