OTHER COOL STUFF

 

Mary-Kate Looks Like Death

Mary-Kate Looks Like Death

The Olsen Twins are now one chick, since both of them are basically half a person.

 

Emma Watson in a Bikini

Emma Watson in a Bikini

Hermione's all grown up! (I feel dirty).

 

Jesse Jane at the AVN Awards

Jesse Jane at the AVN Awards

Jesse Jane was "Best Dressed" on the red carpet at the AVNs. If you think this isn't a big deal, you obviously haven't seen the way most porn stars dress!!

 

Mary-Kate is Scary

Mary-Kate is Scary

Still-skinny Mary-Kate Olsen looked stunning (as in, we're still stunned by this look) when she walked the red carpet wearing Kelly green, a dead raccoon, and a chestplate.

 

Mary-Kate Hungry

Mary-Kate Hungry

Finally! Someone got an Olsen twin to eat!

 

Scary Mary Poppins

Scary Mary Poppins

Seriously, I was freaked out by Mary Poppins as a kid, but never this bad!

 

The Mary-Kate Olsen Ride

The Mary-Kate Olsen Ride

Yes, but how old do you have to be?

 

Suck My News Weekly: Chewbacca Is One of Us

Suck My News Weekly: Chewbacca Is One of Us

Finally, Chewbacca becomes an American, TomKat has boring sex, Mary-Kate quits college, and other stuff we really can’t remember right now.

 

Suck My News Weekly: NEW POPE, VIRGIN MARY, & AN IDOL!

Suck My News Weekly: NEW POPE, VIRGIN MARY, & AN IDOL!

Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.

 

Divine Visions of Mary & Jesus

Divine Visions of Mary & Jesus

Here are some of the most mystifying Virgin Mary sightings ever captured on film. Kind of.

 

The Olsen Twins Turn 18

The Olsen Twins Turn 18

The day Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen turned 18 was probably the greatest day of our lives.