Justin Long and Drew Barrymore were "caught" frollicking on the beach together. "Caught" as in after numerous calls to the paparazzi they began to pose weirdly on the beach.

From William Goldman to Diablo Cody you've come a long way screenwriters. How on Earth did you get studios to pay you when she is the "best" of the year?

Do not do these things if you want to live a long and healthy life.

Good news! We're no longer biodegradable living organisms.

Always tough to figure out what it is she does, or why she's famous, but she does have long legs, so that's something.

After you buy your sofa usually you have to go to a completely different store to pickup some chicken nuggets to eat while sitting on the new sofa. No longer!

In theaters 2-8-08. When hundreds of videotapes showing torture, murder and dismemberment are found in an abandoned house, they reveal a serial killer's decade-long reign of terror and become the most disturbing collection of evidence homicide detectives have ever seen.

How long do you think he and his friends giggled like schoolgirls saying "Are you gonna do it? really? you're gonna do it? OMG OMG"

Posing as a car seat won't get you across the border. Everyone knows that Mexican's are far too good a worker to be caught sitting for so long.

After attending a Kennedy Center gala, the White House realized someone had stolen several yards of curtains from the Oval Office.

These elves have been nice all year long, and now they're ready to get wild! Brought to you by PlayStation.

A coal worker in China takes a bath after a long day in the mines. Sorry Ling Po, no amount of water will shake off the black lung.

After a long day of work, what better way to cool off than a delicious Bird's Nest drink.

In theaters 3-28-08. A young man finds out his long lost father is an assassin. And when his father is murdered, the son is recruited into his father's old organization and trained by a man named Sloan to follow in his dad's footsteps.

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, the ipod was introduced to a high school auditorium of nerds. It was a simpler time when iphone=poser meant nothing.

Hell no, I am not going to smell that. I don’t care how long he has been missing. It looks like he was missing his ass by about 2 feet long before he even got himself lost.

You know, in the long run these really aren't that big. Sure, they are delicious, but in no way are they worthy of being noted as "ass" sized.

Britney Spears forgot, once again, to wear clothes big enough to cover her saggy saddlebags. Someone buy this girl a tent or a few yards of cloth.

In theaters 1-25-08. Jerry inadvertently erases all of the videos in his friend's store. In order to keep the store's one loyal customer, an elderly lady with a tenuous grasp on reality, the pair re-create a long line of films including The Lion King, Rush Hour, Ghostbusters, When We Were Kings, Back to the Future, Driving Miss Daisy, and Robocop, putting themselves and their townspeople into it.

Someone left Dina Lohan in the dryer too long and she done shrunked. 3 feet or not, she still plans on furiously ruining her daughters life.