Real men don't bet the spread, they bet the "tecmo".

The fact that a couple of balloons can bring soccer to a screeching halt is reason enough why the Super Bowl this weekend is where real "Football" is played.

Score a little credit for Scientology and Will Smith as his film proclaimed "Giants lose to Patriots for second time this season 23 to 7." LRH lives!

Bring those 16-0 Patriots fans down a peg by reminding them of their past with this horrific video from the 86 Super Bowl.

This week Britney Spears is knocked up, Tom Cruise is a Mommy, and Carson Daly is still a douche bag.

While you were pwning newbs in Halo 3, your grandparents were participating in a cross-country Wii bowling tourney. Retirement never looked so good.

Maggie Gyllenhaal is the cover girl for some lingerie company. Check out the picture and submit your best "her nose looks like Ms. Piggy" joke. We couldn't decide.

John Madden claims he wanted to make video games more realistic. Watching this clip of Bo Jackson go crazy all over the field reminds us he took the fun out.

Slip 'n Slide's are universally acknowledged as unsafe. This hillbilly ignored common sense and threw his babies like he's trying to get a 7-10 split.

Now who halps me drag to fud bowl?

Froot Loops now have straws made of cereal to suck up your leftover milk! No more looking like a slob, drinking from the bowl.

Inexplicably, this dog wants whatever the thinks is at the bottom of this toilet bowl. And the toilet water pays the ultimate price.

Cuz mah bowl still emptah.

In 1985 the Chicago Bears won the Superbowl, and created the greatest rap video ever to celebrate. Now that they're up against the Colts for 2007's 'Bowl, we'd like to play this video as a loving tribute to a stupendous line-up. I love you, Sweetness. I love you, McMahon.

Singer Brandy was involved in a fatal car accident on Dec. 30, 2006, and was caused when Brandy's 2007 Land Rover collided with this 2005 Toyota, resulting in a four-car pile-up.

On Dec. 30, 2006, Brandy's Land Rover collided with a 2005 Toyota, which was struck by this '89 Acura.

It’s time for the best bowl ever! No, not a bowl full of Cookie Crisp… a bowl full of Super!

More from the Paris Exposed files! Here she smokes a bowl in an elevator that's clearly marked "NO SMOKING."

Kevin Federline did a Nationwide Insurance commercial that's scheduled to air during the Super Bowl – and people are upset that it's insulting to fast food workers!

Ever taken a 10-pound bowling ball to the groin? Well watch someone who did!