FAT KONG |
Views: 3057 |
Make a video game controller out of anything. |
Views: 3032 |
News Girl Caught With Something Between Her Legs |
Views: 2966 |
Crackhead at Funeral |
Views: 2951 |
Slinky on a treadmill |
Views: 2936 |
Wheel of Fortune Fail |
Views: 2847 |
17-year-old Pistol Whips Her Mom For a Car |
Views: 2773 |
Wii Fit with Britney Spears |
Views: 683 |
Lindsay Lohan's Boob Song |
Views: 597 |
Sexy or Ugly Friend? |
Views: 525 |
Ends predictably.
Has his own way of dealing with illegal parking.
The road to professional sports is one of the most effective sociopath assembly lines in the world. Separated from their peers by talent as kids, pandered to as teenagers, and idolized as adults, today's college and professional athletes know that forgiveness is only one contrite press conference away. We keep track of their antisocial behavior and marvel at their sociopathleticism in the Sociopathlete Round-Up.

Sociopathlete: Sal Alosi, Strength and Conditioning Coach, New York Jets,
Former Linebacker, Hofstra
We learned today that Alosi has been suspended indefinitely (his suspension was previously scheduled to be up at the end of this season) when the Jets "found out" that he had ordered players to form a wall along the sidelines in order to impede Dolphins special teamer Nolan Carroll if he ventured out of bounds. Alosi stuck his leg out, tripped Carroll, and is now awaiting his sportsmanship award from Jets coach Rex Ryan. The other shoe may not have dropped in this case, since the notion of a strength coach taking it upon himself to order inactive players to interfere with punt coverage in an organized manner seems a bit far-fetched. If it came from above, or even from the top, this could place the entire Jets franchise in the pantheon of sociopathletics.
You know when you get really drunk and high from huffing spray paint (gold) out of a paper bag (brown) and you and your friends come up with the most AMAZING idea? These are the greatest ideas, right? Right?
What do you think would happen if for some reason you had access to all the elements and ingredients to make your ideas reality... Yeah and your grandparents owned some sweatshops where 12-year-olds slaved away making socks for the British Premier League, so you have a big trust fund. Basically, you have infinite resources. What do you think would happen?
Yeah, besides the first ever monkey, marshmallow go-cart champion being crowned, (Mr. Chattlebanks), because that's awesome.
What would happen?
You would make some pretty awful stuff, stuff that would amaze people on one level and one level only. Yeah, the "why-the-F-did-this-ever-get-made-and-who-thought-that-this-was-a-good-idea-were-they-high-on-gold-spray-paint?" level. You got it!
Oh, you want an example of this kind of idea brought to fruition?
How about this video where an underage white girl runway model, Karlie Kloss, claims to be from St. Luis and then plays ping pong with Notorious Wally Green?
Did that illustrate my point? Did I have a point?
I guess my point is that money is no substitute for talent and true genius, and neither is gold... spray paint.
P.S. JD Ferguson directed the above video. Is he the greatest director of our time?
Disclaimer: I did no research whatsoever into how this video actually came about, and I know nothing about JD Ferguson.
If there's one thing we love about Mariah Carey - wait. There's really nothing we love about Mariah Carey. Her voice is horrible these days and it looks as though she's slowly turning into a troll doll before our eyes. The only redeming quality about her is that she loves to get drunk during some awards ceremony that doesn't matter. We don't blame her. Check this out...
This guy should get together with Andy from The Office and start a band. We'd totally illegally download their album.

Well, maybe they didn't do it. But according to this 2012 London Olympics logo, Lisa Simpson did do something nasty to Bart that may or may not be illegal is most of the universe. The British, man. Whether it's driving on the wrong side of the road or their teeth, they always have to be different. And perverted.
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How fat do you have to be in order for a DSL line to have trouble downloading your picture? This fat.
After the INS started rounding up illegal's, Taco Bell scrambled to replace the workers in its lucrative lettuce trade. The leaf must flow!
Want to make a friend believe that they owe the government thousands of dollars for downloading illegal music! Well, send them this Illegal Music Download Sabotage!
Cops in NYC are apparently breaking the law. Luckily the opposite of a superhero, "Jimmy Justice", is trolling the streets. He busts cops with his mom's handycam.
"Illegal Aliens" is as big of a B-movie as you can get. And Chyna Doll's performance is worthy of a John Waters film!
From a documentary on the drug trade. This stuff's fascinating, yet very very illegal. (Thanks, Lawyers!)