Paris Hilton's wax figure got outfitted in prison stripes... good thing stripes are in this season!!

Sarah Silverman gave the Hilton heiress a good grilling last night at the MTV Movie Awards... Paris was hardly spared, and her face totally shows it! God, I want to hump you, Sarah!

Watch Paris Hilton in jail right now! It's live! It's boring! It's a great way to spend the afternoon!

Check out this weird commercial of a lawyer advertising on TV that he wants only one client: Paris Hilton.

Paris is getting into shape before prison, and luckily for us man-lovers, her trainer is SUPER hot!!

The paps were hot on Paris Hilton's heels yesterday as she drove HERSELF to a lawyer meeting, after previously getting rides from mom Kathy. Paris, you're bad!

Watch a simulation of Paris Hilton's soon-to-come behind-bars sexcapades!

Paris Hilton constantly inspires art. That's why someone made a wax rendition of her in the middle of a suicide attempt. That won't get you out of prison, Paris!!

Even the wind is against Ms. Hilton as she leaves a courthouse appearance. Remember, Paris, behind bars you only get two pairs of undies per week!

Paris Hilton got sentenced to 45 days in jail! YAY!!!!

Slutty, slutty, forgotten Hilton.

Perez Hilton is the reigning gossip queen on the internet, and our beloved Henry has a few choice words for him.

Jason "Gummi Bear" Davis, larger brother of Brandon "Greasy Bear" Davis, attended Paris Hilton's recent birthday bash in Vegas. It appears as though he pissed himself, as well!

Paris Hilton showed up at her own birthday party with what looked like foundation clumsily smeared on her face, and sparkle lotion glooped on her chest. Doing your make-up in the limo, Paris?

The "Parass Hilton" buttplug is a must-have for any celeb-obsessed loved one this season!

Paris & Nikki Hilton and Nicole Richie are seen here posing with Michael Jackson. Weirder still is the old man next to them with the oxygen machine.

At one time, Paris used a fake Ohio ID. The weirdest part? It lists her eyes as green, even though she has naturally brown eyes and wears blue contacts!

Here's a surprise: Paris Hilton likes to get trashed with friends. And then she likes to take pictures of herself.

Paris Hilton’s belongings! We’ve found’em! You’ll want them! And most all – you’ll want to have sex with them!

Some of Paris Hilton's possessions were auctioned off, including hundreds of very private photos and, journals, and video. Here she is pretending to be clean. LIAR!