This is why swimming with dolphins is never a good idea. Just what the hell are you supposed to do when you find out your idiot wife signed you up for the wrong "experience"?

Hell no, I am not going to smell that. I don’t care how long he has been missing. It looks like he was missing his ass by about 2 feet long before he even got himself lost.

"Oh lady you don't know what you have done here. I am going to eat the hell out of your shoes. Prepare yourself!"

"Yo April! Splinter just escaped from… screw it. Who the hell shaved me like a dumb ass turtle? … and paint? Seriously?"

Ok, so apparently that is a man, not a short gnome woman. Whatever the case, it’s a pretty sad day in hell when a short dyke looking guy is better looking than you are. Sucks to be Brooke.

"Man kid, your face looks so funny, I bet your mom is ugly as hell. I can hear my eyes blinking and I am friggin hungry. Give me that damned cake!"

Chris Crocker is going to rape the hell out of his 15 minutes of fame. It takes a lot of public affection to be commemorated in paint!

The husband can be heard saying he "knew this would happen". Um, then why the hell did you let her drive? Did he know because he cut the brake line?

Maybe these girls aren't really fighting, but it looks like they are really trying to slap the hell out of each other. Latent hostility, anyone?

Now that she's been released from prison, Paris is on her way to annoy the hell out of he neighbors in the Hollywood Hills.

Yeah that’s an acoustic guitar that J Mascis is playing the holy hell out of, but he’s added some bells and whistles like only Dinosaur Jr. can.

The voluptuous McPheever looked hot as hell at this year's Grammy Awards.

The awesomest scary Christmas horror movie parody that won't be coming to a theatre near you!!

Maybe you were too busy doing speed to notice the finer things in the fast lane, but we’ll give you the benefit of the doubt. Bust this pop quiz and we’ll let you off with a warning.

She's flexible, he's amazed, I'm cracking the hell up. Everybody wins!

Raise your Hell's Lil' Angel the right way! Get him this DIY tattoo maker set. Safer than prison ink!

Are you going to heaven or hell? Well, Simon Right from the Path of the Savior Church is here to tell you!

Computers jumped out of the World Trade Center, too? (Yes, we know. But we're already going to hell)

Here's an inspirational video of sorts from a guy named Matt. He travelled the world and he danced. Yep.

According to Allah, if you like the World Cup you're going to hell. Or you're going to be judged. Whatevs.