Soccer Star David Beckham and his hot Spice Wife have settled down state side. Who better to give them a proper American greeting than Philip Norris?

Scissors For Lefty came by the studio and played us a stripped down version of their hit song “Ghetto Ways.” We dare you to try and get it out of your head. You will fail.

ROBO-BABY MAKES ME SCARED! COMPUTERUS IS SHUTTING DOWN!

Sit down on my lap, sweetie, and we'll talk about whatever pops up. Too late!

Amateur stuntman Rod Kimble (ANDY SAMBERG) has a problem – his step-father Frank (IAN MCSHANE) is a jerk. Frank picks on Rod, tosses him around like a rag doll in their weekly sparring sessions, and definitely doesn’t respect him, much less his stunts. But when Frank falls ill, it’s up to Rod to stage the jump of his life, in order to save his step-father. The plan: Jump 15 buses, raise the money for Frank’s heart operation, and then…kick his ass.

A classic upside-down picture: old lady, or young hottie?

...Because they WILL put you on the Jumbotron, dummy.

Persian bubble-butt babe and sex tape maker extraordinaire Kim Kardashian takes her ass for a walk in some plushy pants. It's like two fat kittens wrestling down there!

Never heard of this boy band before, but there's so much awkward sexuality going on here I don't know where to start. Maybe "interracial gay pedophilia" is a good place.

Dear lord Michelle Marsh is running topless down the beach. If it were nearly any other woman on the planet, save Star Jones, it would be hot. But those "fun"-bags are like sacks of wet meat your step-dad is about to slug you with.

Maria Menounos got a Hollywood star or something – I don't remember because she wasn't wearing a bra!

A semi truck fell right on top of a small car, and rescuers had to use a crane and the jaws of life to get to him. The most amazing part – he walks away!

Is too windah ovah heer!

What's more embarrassing? The fall, the devastating silence after she lands on her head, the pity-applause they get afterwards, or the Wham song they did their routine to?

Carmen just loves getting down to her skivvies for her fans!

BRB need 2 write it down

Miss USA showed poise in times of hardship when, during the Miss Universe Pageant, she fell on her tush and bounced right back up, as though nothing happened!

A Tae Kwon Do fighter gets kick in the head so hard that he falls to the ground, then tries to get up and stumbles around like a drunken jerk! Yay sports!

Eva Cavalli, sister of designer Roberto Cavalli, was working the runway when she had a fashion disaster! Good thing you were wearing knickers, Eva!

Misha had a full-on nip-slip when her tiny titty fell out of her frilly frock! Dang, that's a tongue-twister!