3dW4RDMYLUVAH88 Author Image

TWILIGHT WAS AHHHMAZING

By: 3dW4RDMYLUVAH88
November 20 2009, 9:41 AM

 

After hearing about a new movie called Twilight: New Moon and that it's kind of a big deal, LiquidGeneration contacted the nearest middle school to see if anyone was interested in writing a review of the movie for us. This is the review we received.

 


OHHH MY GAWWWWD YOU GUYS YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO BELIEVE THIS BUT I SAW EDWARD CULLEN WITH HIS SHIRT OFF I CAN TOTALLY DIE NOW. I PRAY THAT HE COMES TO MY SCHOOL AND SWEEPS ME OFF MY FEET AND ME AND HIM CAN RUN AWAY AFTER HE MURDERS BELLA BECAUSE HE WANTS TO GO OUT WITH ME AND THEN WE KISS DURING STUDY HALL THEN WE HAVE SO MANY BABIES OMG THIS MOVIE WAS SO GOOOOOD.

SOOOOOO GOOOOOOOOD. I CAN'T EVEN KEEP MY EYES OPEN RIGHT NOW ME AND MY FRO9ENDS WENT TO THE MIDNIGHT SCREENING AND WE ATE POPCORN BUT NOT MY FAT FRIEND ANGELA SHE SAYS SHE NEEDS TO GO ON A DIET BECAUSE SHE WANTS TO LOOK GOOD FOR JACOB!!!@!!!! LIKE REALLY, ANGELA, JACOB DOESN'T EVEN KNOW YOU EXIST YOU WERE A FANNY PACK TO SCHOOL AND YOUR FAT HE'S TOTALLY NOT GOING TO BE INTO YOU. MAYBE ONE OF THE GUYS FROM HARRY POTTER LIKE THAT FIRE CROTCH KID, BUT NOT JACOB. JACOB IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU ANGELA AND I KNOW YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR THAT BUT I'M SORRY YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A SHOT BUT IT WAS SO NICE SEEING THE MOVIE WITH A BFF JUST LIKE YOU.

SPEAKING OF!!! I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE JACOB IS GOING OUT WITH THAT GAWKY SQUINTY FISH FACE TAYLOR SWIFT. WHAT KIND OF LOSER DOES SHE THINK SHE IS ANYWAY. EVERYBODY KNOWS JACOB IS JUST USING HER FOR SEX EWEWWWWW. SHE'S SUCH A DIRTY SKANK IF SHE WAS IN MY CLASS I BET SH'E GIVE  EVERYBODY AIDS WITH HER EYES. I H8 U TAYLOR DON'T COME NEAR ME!!!!!!

!!@!!@W!@!!@@@@@@@@!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY THING I REALLY DIDN'T LIKE IN THIS MOVIE IS BELLA. I'M SORRY SHE'S JUST SOOOOO STUCK UP ALL THE TIME AND SHE BITES HER LIP WHAT'S ON THERE ANYWAY? DO HER LIPS TASTE LIKE LICORICE OR SOMETHING OR IS SHE TRYING TO EAT A ZIT OFF THEM I BET IT'S THE ZIT. SHE'S TOTALLY NOT A GOOD PERSON FOR EDWARD HER FACE LOOKS LIKE A TROLL. WHAT DOES HE EVEN SEE HER IN HER? I REALLY HOPE SHE DIES EVENTUALLY BECAUSE EDWARD DESERVES SO MUCH BETTER DON'T YOUTHINK? I MEAN, I'M SORRY IT'S NOT LIKE SHE'S SOME AMAZINGH PERSON WHO CAN COOL AND WILL CLEAN FOR HIM AND GIVE HIM EVERYTHING HE NEEDS LIKE I WOULD. I WOULD TOTALLY ROCK HIS WORLD IF HE MET ME I JUST KNOW IT...JUST GIVE ME THE CHANCE EDWORD YOU KNOW YOU'D LOVE ME FOREVAHHHHHHHHH!

AHHHHHHH! CAN'T WAIT TILL PARTY 3 COMES OUT IT WILL BE SO MUCH FUN!!!

LOVE YOU.

 

 
LG Staff Author Image

It's Point A Gun At Something Adorable Friday!!

By: LG Staff
November 13 2009, 3:04 PM

 

Today it's Point A Gun At Something Adorable Friday, featuring puppies and kitties (or kittehs, for the annoying people who come here). Why do people want to put a gun to faces of their little furry friends? We can only speculate it has something to do with imbreeding. But we're not scientists, so how the hell would we know.

 

A young a-hole in training. (via hangglide)

 

Why do parents buy Crocs for their kids? And why doesn't this dog bite off that little brat's head? (via ChickClick)

 

Crazy eyes and rape face are usually the same thing. (via randy metcalf)

...more pics after the jump....

 

Dude kind of looks like Vince Vaugh's tardy brother. (via castermer)

 

"Deaadd kittteehhhhhh" (via sayzey)

 

At least the blood will look cool on the window. RIGHT, GUYS!?!?! (via misterentropy)

 

Point a gun at anything adorable lately? Be sure to send us a picture: talkbalk@liquidgeneration.com!

 
Slippy Jenkins Author Image

Who Has The Best CGI/Animated Chesticles?

By: Slippy Jenkins
November 12 2009, 12:18 PM

In this month's Playboy Magazine, supernerd James Cameron said he designed his female Avatar aliens with breasts, even though they're not placental mammals (don't worry, we have no idea what that means either!). Since the movie cost around $500 million and it's in 3D, we can only hope that those boobs are so amazing they pop out of the screen and punch us in the face so hard they give us a black eye. We hope! But what if they aren't? Whose computer generated/animated boobs will you fall back on?

We've always been partial to Angelina Jolie in Beowulf, which you probably didn't see because the movie sucked. But damn, look! They even made her eyes look like she wants nothing to do with us, just like in real life!

 

Do you have any favorite computer generated characters? Share in the comments. Watch our 10 Sexiest Cartoon Characters if you need a little help deciding.

 
Slippy Jenkins Author Image

BREAKING: Swine Flu On The Verge of Destroying Hollywood!

By: Slippy Jenkins
November 10 2009, 2:03 PM

Boston.com outed all the celebrities who've had the Swine Flu, and good for them. These people need to be taken off the streets. They need to be banned from the public. I know these people are celebrities, and I know the entertainment they provide for hundreds of people across the world is important. But they need to stop...stop doing whatever they are doing. I'm talking about David Krejci and Chris Douglas-Roberts. I'm talking about that Rupert Grint. Landon Donovan, Brian Littrell, and that Melissa Rycroft, too. David Boreanaz, you're in our sights...

WAIT A MINUTE.

WHO THE HELL ARE THESE PEOPLE? WHY THE HELL IS BOSTON.COM TRYING TO MAKE MY HEAD EXPLODE TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHO THESE PEOPLE ARE? EVEN RACHEL MADDOW AND DR. SANJAY GUPTA BARELY HIT MY RADAR BECAUSE I'M ALLERGIC TO CNN AND MSNBC (Fox News all the way, baby!). YOU MEAN LADY GAGA IS NOT SICK!?! JON & KATE PLUS AND THEIR EIGHT LITTLE PIGGIES DON'T HAVE THE SNIFFLES YET!?! THANK YOU. THANK YOU, LORD. THANK YOU, SWEET EVERYBODY. BOSTON.COM, NEXT TIME YOU SEND AN ALERT OUT LIKE THIS MAKE SURE IT'S ACTUALLY ABOUT THE PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT BEFORE I GO ALL CAPLOCKS ON YOUR ASS AND HURT SOMEBODY.

/KTHXBAI

P.S. I can't wait for this movie to come out...

 

(via Boston.com)

 

 

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Kate Gosselin Wears A Bikini

Kate Gosselin Wears A Bikini

Avert your eyes!?! Get sexy with yourself!?! We can't tell what's going on here either.

 

Japanime Eyes

Japanime Eyes

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The Only Picture From The Emmy's You Need to See

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Tanak Tunak Tun: The Greatest Music Video Ever

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Feast your eyes upon the best thing to happen to music videos, ever. EVER.

 

Kirsten Dunst Got A Black Eye

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Which is another way of saying, "Justice has been served!"

 

Jenna Jameson Has STDS In Her Eyes

Jenna Jameson Has STDS In Her Eyes

Is it possible for any body part of a porn star to age naturally?

 

The Hills... Have Eyes

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Here’s a sneak peak at the new horror movie featuring the cast of The Hills. After seeing this, you’ll never sleep with Spencer the same way again.

 
 

Wino is Nude-o

Wino is Nude-o

There's a catch, they used tape and a guitar to cover the nasty bits so you're eyes wouldn't be as scared as Amy's arm after a night with Blake and crack.

 

A Leprechaun in Alabama

A Leprechaun in Alabama

An oldie but a goodie, watch as people react to a Leprechaun sighting in Mobile, Alabama.

 

Hayden's O Face

Hayden's O Face

The award for Best Supporting Bodyguard in a Paparazzi Photo goes to “guy fondling his walkie-talkie with his eyes closed.”

 

The Brew Crew is Creepy

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This Brewers fan intensely takes in the sight of Erin Andrews to overcome the upcoming disappointment of another miserable season.

 

Fergie's Ass Gets Waxed

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Josh Duhamel got Fergalicious on the Black Eyed Pee! Scrigity scrigity scratch!

 

Jordan Has Dumb Kids

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Adopted, we are assuming. Never the less sharing genetic intelligence. Look at those "slow" eyes.

 

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