It's like the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest but in Japan.

Eventually they moved his food off the top of the slide, but not until they were finished mocking him.

The dog quickly peed on Natalie Portman and was heard muttering "you're next Lucas".

Anything involving a Hot Dog on a Stick costume is a winner.

Since it has literally become unthinkable that people will ever feel sympathy and "Leave Britney Alone", think of the poor dog that has to live through this.

Between a Schwarzenegger soundboard prank and the "Who Let The Dogs?" scandal, is Mitt running for president in Y2K? Dude is behind the times.

The owner adds one balloon every time his dog wants to eat.

Dog the negro hunter's wife has some HUGE boobs. More like ICBMs… gross.

This week Philip Norris brings you the week’s most fabulously racist news.

See what happens when an LG Operative sneaks on the set of the Ellen Show. Hint: he tries to kill her dog.

Terry Hatcher continues to offend Asian sensibilities after her "Philippino" comment on Desperate housewives. Here she is dressed like a geisha in a poorly stunted attempt to apologize.

Hey this is Michael Vick! Let’s get ready for some hard core dog fights bro!

NSFW: NFL quarterback, Michael Vick, plead guilty yesterday. This was all thanks to McGruff, the crime dog's, harsh interrogation tactics.

Your dog makes seriously scary noises. You can A) Take him to the vet or B) Post a video of him for the internets.

Olivia Munn raw dogs about 75 percent of a mustard covered weiner. Attack of The "Hot".

Who needs annoying locks? This dog with childproof your drawers against the cleverest of babies!

Exclusive in Japan! Apparently cheese-stuffed crust pizza is for amateurs! This pizza features hot dog roll crust, sausage patties, Canadian bacon, mushrooms, and what looks like green beans! Yummerz!!

A dog got run over by one of the bikers in the Tour de France! O noes!!! (The dog was uninjured.)

The stop-motion video shows baby Bumbo teleporting and laser-shooting the dog. What a badass!!

This little pooch was born with a perfect heart-shaped spot on his side. Isn't he the CUTEST?