You thought Juaquin Pheonix was bad, you got to check some of these out!

Summer is in full swing so make sure you know what every barbeque master needs to know – how to cook the perfect hamburger.

Give thanks for having nobody to cook for you this Thanksgiving Day, and also for the start of a depressing holiday season.

Just in time for your upcoming barbeque, it’s women chefs! (This WYR’s a special request from Chris)

David Archuleta, David Cook, and Sanjaya have a little chat on the phone. Hilarity ensues!

Weird but par for the course with this guy.

He truly understands what courtside seats are all about.

David Hasselhoff has one of the best hairy chests of our generation. Today, we celebrate him.

American Idol's David Archuleta giggles like the most adorable child/bitch ever.

"Running With The Devil" was a weak outline of Eddie Van Halen shredding until DLR got his vocal track down.

This week Britney, Paris and Jodie Foster get gay together, Scrooge McDuck is mistaken for Donald Trump and David Blaine is on drugs.

Watch these cooks get hot with some steamy turkey on turkey hardcore action.

Al Sharpton is somewhere flipping out while David Duke is dancing. RACISM!

Bread makers threw care to the wind and cooked up a pope sized pizza pontiff. Alter boys everywhere concluded this is one church official they would gladly eat out.

Pete Doherty proves one of two things in this video; he is immortal or he's cooking frosted flakes not heroin.

This is the health industry's answer to sugary food? Cooking with ass batter? No thanks pooh, that’s one rumbly in my tumbly, we don’t want.

This week Britney loses her kids, David Copperfield rapes somebody, and other important worldly events. Philip Norris has the latest!

David Letterman sat down with Paris Hilton and asked her about the only thing he finds interesting in her career, jail time. The results are awkward and priceless.