Can do amazing things.

Here's a dispatch from the Furry Movement. A portrait of a man or lady dressed as a dog...while holding their dog. What's scary about this isn't the fact that the Furry appears to be on crystal meth, what's scary is that somebody allowed this person into their studio to take this photograph. We believe in Limited Government, but when citizens are allowed to dress like freaking morons and these freaking morons are allowed to own dogs and these morons somehow find a way to use the internet and upload these photos, well, we just think there should be a special Waterboarding and Execution Division of the US Government that would punish people who do these sort of things. It's not adorable, dude.  It's just disturbing and sad and we're going to go to our room and cry now. 

You can see more of this disgustingness here.

Well, well, well. Aren’t we just the cat’s meow. And I say good for you, Tiger! Listen, we all get it; we’ve all been there. I mean, who among us isn’t a billion dollar entity who regularly dips the ol’

9-iron into a waitress’ wedge? It’s the circle of life! (And just a regular Tuesday, if you live in Florida or Nevada!)

But why is the media so willing to fault Tiger for these transactionsgressions? If there’s anyone to blame for Tiger’s “Mistress of the Month Club”, it’s his parents. Give your baby a porn star’s name, and what can you expect? It’s like naming a kid Jeeves. Or Ruth. One’s bound to fetch your smoking jacket; the other’s destined to become a hulking Eastern European who sloughs off the dead skin on your heels.

But Tiger’s parents’ poor name choices aside, what’s the big deal? Should the big-bucks sponsors like Nike and Cadillac really care what Tiger does off the tee? Because by my count, he’s just sticking with brand awareness:

Nike: “Just Do It”

Check.

Cadillac: “Re-imagined. Re-inspired. Re-invigorated. All designed to reignite the soul.”

Check.

AT&T: “Talk is good.”

If you’re a brand, check.

So by that logic, Tiger’s Sexy Times may just help our economy keep on going. His marriage may not, but that’s his parents’ fault.