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I'm not saying anything because I don't want to be fired. But you can answer in the comments if you'd like. SLIPPY, OUT!
Ladies and gentlemen, feast your eyes upon this sweaty, balding dude and his frumpy, snaggle-toothed wife. They are going to make a porno together. From the UK Sun:
Lisa Brand and Tommy Barnes have earned £1,300 from three X-rated movies and plan to make four more to raise cash for a beach ceremony in Cancun, Mexico, next June.
The pair, who have four children, have played a photographer and lingerie model who strip for a romp, and also appeared in a threesome.
Lisa, 34, even dripped hot wax on Tommy's chest at a motorway service station hotel to recreate a scene from Madonna's 1993 movie Body of Evidence.
She also spanked him with a paddle. She said: "I was laughing my head off.
"I have told my mum and most of my friends. They understand. It's always been our dream to have a fairytale wedding."
Tommy, 36, added at Macclesfield, Cheshire: "It's our five minutes of fame - something to look back on whe we're older. It has brought us closer together."
Yeah, Tommy. Five minutes of fame and LETTING THE WHOLE WORLD KNOW that your wife is in desperate need of some teeth whitening and Invisalign. REAL SMART.
Amy Winehouse Has Fake Ones
Oh, look who got a new pair of boobs! And from the looks of it they fell right out of a gumball machine and onto her chest. Now we know Amy is rich, so why does it look like she has a cheap a boob job as that girl in high school who got addicted to crack, like, ten years later?
Kim Kardashian Notices Something On Her Chest
Kim Kardashian is amazed to find to huge boobs on her chest.
Heidi and Spencer Fake Mother's Day
The most natural thing in this photo is Heidi's chest, this could signal the apocalypse.
10 Best Hasselhoff Videos Ever
David Hasselhoff has one of the best hairy chests of our generation. Today, we celebrate him.
Brooke Hogan Tries To Bounce
The punching bags Hulk had installed on his daughters chest show no signs of life.
Lohan's Chest is Bee-utiful
They can take the booze out of the drunk but they can't take the fun out of the fun bags.
Heidi Klum Rides With Ferrell
It took Will Ferrell's hairy chest to get Heidi Klum back into SI's swimsuit issue, whatever works!
Orange Joo A Guido
Being a Guido is a full time job, hair doesn't gel itself, tans don't spray themselves on, and chests don't wax themselves, a Guido's gotta do it himself.
Ellen Ripley's Niece
Chest Burster baby is adorable. Who doesn't want to just wrap him around your face?
Paul Stanley's Plaster Caster
Paul Stanley's got some wicked eyebrows. Luckily with a little face paint and his chest hair intact he can still be Gene's effeminate sidekick.
Anna's Overdose
I once overdosed on sexy. But then John Travolta brought me back by stabbing my chest with a needle. I'm cool now.
Ashley Olsen's Chest
Wow, an Olsen goes out shopping in her bra! Too bad we're not seeing anything. At all.
Paris' Make-Up Disaster
Paris Hilton showed up at her own birthday party with what looked like foundation clumsily smeared on her face, and sparkle lotion glooped on her chest. Doing your make-up in the limo, Paris?