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Spend the Weekend Learning How To Cook A Turkey

By: LG Staff
November 20 2009, 4:01 PM

 

 

The weekend is hear and Thanksgiving is just around the corner. Maybe you should try learning how to cook a turkey before you embarass yourself in front of the family you hate.

 

 

 
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The Christian Side Hug WILL NOT Get You Pregnant

By: LG Staff
November 20 2009, 1:10 PM

 

 

But it will surely put you in the Friend Zone. This Christian Rap group is so going places.

 
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TWILIGHT WAS AHHHMAZING

By: 3dW4RDMYLUVAH88
November 20 2009, 9:41 AM

 

After hearing about a new movie called Twilight: New Moon and that it's kind of a big deal, LiquidGeneration contacted the nearest middle school to see if anyone was interested in writing a review of the movie for us. This is the review we received.

 


OHHH MY GAWWWWD YOU GUYS YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO BELIEVE THIS BUT I SAW EDWARD CULLEN WITH HIS SHIRT OFF I CAN TOTALLY DIE NOW. I PRAY THAT HE COMES TO MY SCHOOL AND SWEEPS ME OFF MY FEET AND ME AND HIM CAN RUN AWAY AFTER HE MURDERS BELLA BECAUSE HE WANTS TO GO OUT WITH ME AND THEN WE KISS DURING STUDY HALL THEN WE HAVE SO MANY BABIES OMG THIS MOVIE WAS SO GOOOOOD.

SOOOOOO GOOOOOOOOD. I CAN'T EVEN KEEP MY EYES OPEN RIGHT NOW ME AND MY FRO9ENDS WENT TO THE MIDNIGHT SCREENING AND WE ATE POPCORN BUT NOT MY FAT FRIEND ANGELA SHE SAYS SHE NEEDS TO GO ON A DIET BECAUSE SHE WANTS TO LOOK GOOD FOR JACOB!!!@!!!! LIKE REALLY, ANGELA, JACOB DOESN'T EVEN KNOW YOU EXIST YOU WERE A FANNY PACK TO SCHOOL AND YOUR FAT HE'S TOTALLY NOT GOING TO BE INTO YOU. MAYBE ONE OF THE GUYS FROM HARRY POTTER LIKE THAT FIRE CROTCH KID, BUT NOT JACOB. JACOB IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU ANGELA AND I KNOW YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR THAT BUT I'M SORRY YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A SHOT BUT IT WAS SO NICE SEEING THE MOVIE WITH A BFF JUST LIKE YOU.

SPEAKING OF!!! I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE JACOB IS GOING OUT WITH THAT GAWKY SQUINTY FISH FACE TAYLOR SWIFT. WHAT KIND OF LOSER DOES SHE THINK SHE IS ANYWAY. EVERYBODY KNOWS JACOB IS JUST USING HER FOR SEX EWEWWWWW. SHE'S SUCH A DIRTY SKANK IF SHE WAS IN MY CLASS I BET SH'E GIVE  EVERYBODY AIDS WITH HER EYES. I H8 U TAYLOR DON'T COME NEAR ME!!!!!!

!!@!!@W!@!!@@@@@@@@!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY THING I REALLY DIDN'T LIKE IN THIS MOVIE IS BELLA. I'M SORRY SHE'S JUST SOOOOO STUCK UP ALL THE TIME AND SHE BITES HER LIP WHAT'S ON THERE ANYWAY? DO HER LIPS TASTE LIKE LICORICE OR SOMETHING OR IS SHE TRYING TO EAT A ZIT OFF THEM I BET IT'S THE ZIT. SHE'S TOTALLY NOT A GOOD PERSON FOR EDWARD HER FACE LOOKS LIKE A TROLL. WHAT DOES HE EVEN SEE HER IN HER? I REALLY HOPE SHE DIES EVENTUALLY BECAUSE EDWARD DESERVES SO MUCH BETTER DON'T YOUTHINK? I MEAN, I'M SORRY IT'S NOT LIKE SHE'S SOME AMAZINGH PERSON WHO CAN COOL AND WILL CLEAN FOR HIM AND GIVE HIM EVERYTHING HE NEEDS LIKE I WOULD. I WOULD TOTALLY ROCK HIS WORLD IF HE MET ME I JUST KNOW IT...JUST GIVE ME THE CHANCE EDWORD YOU KNOW YOU'D LOVE ME FOREVAHHHHHHHHH!

AHHHHHHH! CAN'T WAIT TILL PARTY 3 COMES OUT IT WILL BE SO MUCH FUN!!!

LOVE YOU.

 

 
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Even People At The LG Office Are Excited for Twilight

By: Slippy Jenkins
November 20 2009, 7:13 AM

One of the artists here (Heri!) really loves Twilight, but he likes to pretend he's so above it and makes fun of those (me) who show just an ounce of interest in the movie. Whatever. BELLA 4 EVAH!

 
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Adorable Internet Starlet's Adorable Fail

By: LG Staff
November 19 2009, 3:07 PM

 

You know God's just getting back at the world for all the horrible webshows on the internet. Instead of just picking us off one by one and sending us to heavan or hell, he's just tossing us about like ragdolls. JUST TAKE US ALREADY, GOD!!! STOP EMBARASSING US!

 

 

Lady Gaga + Cartman + Walken = Mind Blown

Lady Gaga + Cartman + Walken = Mind Blown

Lady Gaga, South Park's Cartman and Christopher Walken perform Poker Face. The internet wins today, everybody can go home.

 

 

 

It's happend with Jesus on pieces of cloth and tree bark, and now it's happening with Michael Jackson on hospital baby scans. What you see here is not just a baby, but the majestic face of the King of Pop Himself, Michael Jackson. This is such a miracle, you guys. How blessed are the parents of this child? Not only does their child look like Michael Jackson, but he'll probably sound and grab his crotch just the way He did. They can only hope, we're sure.

In the name of the Father, Son, and Michael Jackson. Amen.

(via Telegraph.co.uk)

 
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Ready, Set, Sneeze!

By: LG Staff
November 19 2009, 7:18 AM

 

This girl has an amazing talent that she's been working on since she shot out of her mother's womb. She can sneeze like there's no tomorrow. We totally wish we could do this so people wouldn't sit next to us on the airplane.

 

 

 
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Pole Dance Makes Wedding Awesome

By: LG Staff
November 18 2009, 1:24 PM

 

 

Most weddings are boring. Not this one. This one is sexy and drunk and awesome.

Update: Some people at LG are saying this is fake. Even if, it's a big fail on both accounts.

 

 

Yes, we're not going to lie. We're going to go see Twilight just like everybody else is. However, we're buying up the 50 seats surrounding us because we don't want to sit next to the people in the videos below. It's not that we find them so annoying, we just don't want to share our tissues with them!  (Just kidding! (j/k again!) (j/k!) (no really, j/k!)

The Nutty Madam

 

The Chubster Spazzes

Click here to see the rest...

 

 

There's nothing like waking up in the morning, turning on your computer, browsing the latest gossip about Selena Gomez and then almost vomiting all over your computer screen after watching a chicken being put in a chicken plucker. Ah, Internet. WE HEART YOU.

 

 

 

 

Get close to your computer screen and check out what the hell is happening in this video. Bob Dylan = certifiably donkey bonkers. I'm not sure if he's channelling Tom Petty or he's just a happy-go-lucky albino leprechaun, but this is prolly one of the greatest things ever and I'll cheerish it for as long as it's on YouTube.

 

 
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10 Sexiest Cinematic Bloodsuckers

By: LG Staff
November 17 2009, 9:18 AM

 

In honor of 'New Moon,' we've decided to put together a list that showcases just how sexy vampires can be. Now don't make a mess of yourself.

 
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Robots Can't Act: Pulp Fiction

By: LG Staff
November 13 2009, 4:28 PM

 

Ladies and gentleman, the future...

 
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It's Point A Gun At Something Adorable Friday!!

By: LG Staff
November 13 2009, 3:04 PM

 

Today it's Point A Gun At Something Adorable Friday, featuring puppies and kitties (or kittehs, for the annoying people who come here). Why do people want to put a gun to faces of their little furry friends? We can only speculate it has something to do with imbreeding. But we're not scientists, so how the hell would we know.

 

A young a-hole in training. (via hangglide)

 

Why do parents buy Crocs for their kids? And why doesn't this dog bite off that little brat's head? (via ChickClick)

 

Crazy eyes and rape face are usually the same thing. (via randy metcalf)

...more pics after the jump....

 

Dude kind of looks like Vince Vaugh's tardy brother. (via castermer)

 

"Deaadd kittteehhhhhh" (via sayzey)

 

At least the blood will look cool on the window. RIGHT, GUYS!?!?! (via misterentropy)

 

Point a gun at anything adorable lately? Be sure to send us a picture: talkbalk@liquidgeneration.com!

 

Beaver Pees In Reporters Face

Beaver Pees In Reporters Face

You have to hand it to CBS for really editing this in a way that generates the LOLs.

 

 

The decision to online date is not an easy one. You are quietly judged by your friends and family; the guy you get coffee from every morning looks at you with a sad face and sometimes -- only sometimes because dogs are fickle! - your dog just refuses to be around you anymore. Yet, everyone's doing it. Liquid Generation's Spanish Fly is here to teach you how to online date with successfull results, every time. Enjoy.

 

 

CBS really knows how to maximize the LOLs by totally editing this in a way that provides embassament for the CBS reporter. Props, yo (word)!

 

 
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From The Tubes: Auto-Tune Cute Kids and Kanye

By: Slippy Jenkins
November 12 2009, 1:21 PM

 

Invite a lady friend over, turn off the lights, and get into the mood. Or just listen to this by yourself and cry. Whatevs.

(via The Gregory Brothers)

 
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Who Has The Best CGI/Animated Chesticles?

By: Slippy Jenkins
November 12 2009, 12:18 PM

In this month's Playboy Magazine, supernerd James Cameron said he designed his female Avatar aliens with breasts, even though they're not placental mammals (don't worry, we have no idea what that means either!). Since the movie cost around $500 million and it's in 3D, we can only hope that those boobs are so amazing they pop out of the screen and punch us in the face so hard they give us a black eye. We hope! But what if they aren't? Whose computer generated/animated boobs will you fall back on?

We've always been partial to Angelina Jolie in Beowulf, which you probably didn't see because the movie sucked. But damn, look! They even made her eyes look like she wants nothing to do with us, just like in real life!

 

Do you have any favorite computer generated characters? Share in the comments. Watch our 10 Sexiest Cartoon Characters if you need a little help deciding.

 

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