Alright, enough already -- we've seen your boobs!!

Friends poop alike.

Britney Spears and Kevin Federline are divorced, but that doesn’t mean that can’t sing a duet together. This is for you old-school LG fans out there who remember our awesome celebrity karaokes.

Britney blasts out her second baby, The Pope blasts Islam and Madonna blasts off. Philip Norris knows it all – because he’s not a stupid woman.

Celebrity Ho-Bags are everywhere, and whether you’re a skanky ho-bag like Lindsay Lohan or a pregnant ho-bag like Britney Spears, everyone wants to be a celebrity ho-bag. Which one are you?

If you’re always dropping your baby and your husband is a total douche bag, there’s only one man to call – The Manny! Join Britney Spears, Kevin Federline and the new man in her life, The Manny, in this new animated sitcom!

This week Britney can chew gum and lie at the same time, Stephen Hawking is a cripple, Daryl Hannah was arrested, and Brad Pitt is making Zombie Movies.

Watch Britney Spears cry, talk about her white trash husband, and the fact that she's a horrible mom, all on The Today Show.

Celebrities are the sluttiest people in the world (see: Britney’s crotch). Of course, not all celebrities are slutty, which is why you’ll have to guess which of these whoretastic celebrity pics are real and which are photoshopped fakes.

This week Britney Spears might be pregnant, President Bush is unpopular with the polls, Scott Stap is a douche bag, and more signs of the Apocalypse.

The Moment Britney Spears Didn’t Want You To See!

This week Britney Spears almost kills her child, the world almost explodes, and other heartbreaking things that make you happy.

This week somebody kills Santa, Morgan Freeman stops racism, people search for Britney Spears on the internets and Kevin Federline drives a Ferrari. Not much going on.

Britney Spears is NOT a nice person and this video proves it. She should burn in hell, we say! Burn!

Britney’s Baby is out of the womb and already he’s complaining about daddy being a Gold Digger. Here’s parody of Kanye West’s ‘Gold Digger’.

You’re Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck’s baby and it’s your job to get down the birth canal as soon as possible. Watch out, Britney’s fetus is gonna make your job very difficult!

Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.

LiquidGeneration created this piece during Britney Spears' pregnancy. Read her Fetus’ blog, watch the Fetus’ webcam, talk with the Fetus via Instant Messenger!

Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.

Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.