This man had a rare condition known as "fetus-in-fetus," wherein an non-survived twin became a calcified mass in his belly. WARNING: gross!!

"Urhines Kendall Icy Eight Special K" is the actual name given to this very lucky newborn. The hospital birth announcement page can be viewed at: http://www.newbabynews.net/hospitals/stf33/public/stf33birthannouncement.pl?babyID=h33-440

It always hurts when you have a face coming out of your mouth. But then again, who cares?

Check it out! The birth of Bambi!

This Texas birth record seems to prove that Beyonce Giselle Knowles was born in 1974, making her 32, not 25 like she claims.

This is not actually puke. It's a child birth that went totally wrong! Woops!

How did Katie Holmes Cruise give birth to TomKitten? David Spade spills the beans.

This week Britney Spears might be pregnant, President Bush is unpopular with the polls, Scott Stap is a douche bag, and more signs of the Apocalypse.

You’re Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck’s baby and it’s your job to get down the birth canal as soon as possible. Watch out, Britney’s fetus is gonna make your job very difficult!

Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.