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Tom L Author Image

Sociopathlete Round-Up

By: Tom L
November 23 2010, 12:28 PM

The road to professional sports is one of the most effective sociopath assembly lines in the world. Separated from their peers by talent as kids, pandered to as teenagers, and idolized as adults, today's college and professional athletes know that forgiveness is only one contrite press conference away. We keep track of their antisocial behavior and marvel at their sociopathleticism in the Sociopathlete Round-Up.


Sociopathlete: Brett Favre, Quarterback, Minnesota Vikings
Brett Favre has the distinction of making the sociopathlete round-up merely by playing his sport. His massive ego demands that he keep the spotlight on himself for as long as the media will indulge him. His head coach was just beheaded. His team is 3 and 7 after losing to division rival Green Bay by a score of 31 to 3. At home. He's owed a minimum of 17 million dollars for this effort. And in case you didn't hear, he texted a picture of his penis to a woman who isn't his wife. And it was flaccid.

Sociopathlete: Tony Parker, Guard, San Antonio Spurs

In the "shockingly sociopathletic" category, a Frenchman turned out to be a lecherous cad. Tony Parker didn't cheat on his wife with Erin Barry, wife of former teammate Brent Barry, according to Parker and his people. They were just sexting. Thanks, Tony. For a second we though you were a complete fucking asshole.

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Chuck McCarthy Author Image

This Man-Boy Is The Real-Deal Man Boy - Watch Out!

By: Chuck McCarthy
January 18 2010, 2:58 PM


Let me paint a picture of a man-boy, a legend in the making. This man-boy lives in the woods of the great northwest - Jack London territory - Twilight territory - Kurt Cobain land... you know, like around Seattle.

He lives like a James Bond-Goldilocks, sneaking into people's houses, stealing planes (he learned to fly from video games), stealing speedboats, using night vision goggles to hunt and live off the land, and supplementing his diet with pizza that he has delivered to the woods. Not too hot -not too cold - extra cheese and just right.


The painting of this legend gets bolder, more intricate with every detail, with every stroke of the brush, and I'm not done stroking.

Like Yogi Bear he doesn't wear shoes while snagging "pic-a-nic" baskets, but he isn't stopping at sandwiches, and Park Ranger Smith isn't the only one he is outsmarting. The police and FBI are hot on his trail for over 50 alleged burglaries. Did I mention that he likes to take "cheeky" pictures of himself with victims' digital cameras (in my book this means pictures of his penis wearing sunglasses)?

Who is this man-boy, this 18yr old legend in the making?

Have you heard of Colton Harris-Moore?  You just did. Oh, and Jason Bourne... GFY!

Watch the video below, and read these articles to find out more.


Now that you are on Team CHM (Facebook Fanpage alert!) and love him more than Jacob Black, would you pre-order a copy of his video game?

What would you call his video game?

What would you call his movie?

Do you think that Mercedes should be paying him for his endorsement?

Chuck McCarthy is the mastermind behind IdeasByChuck.com, where he gives away great ideas in the hopes that you turn them into reality and remember to send him a small percentage of your profits. He Twitters here and Tumbls here. Chuck will be guest blogging for LiquidGeneration the next couple weeks!

 

Jesus Christ Jail Bonds

Jesus Christ Jail Bonds

We'd just these guys, so should you.

 

Just Like Mommy

Just Like Mommy

This child's drawing is precious and illustrates the bond between a mother and her young. The only problem is that the picture was drawn by her son.

 

Minor League Baseball Brawl

Minor League Baseball Brawl

It is good to see minor leaguers are learning how to kick some ass. Hopefully they get called up and teach Barry or A-Rod a lesson or two with their fists.

 

Awkward Moments in Parenting

Awkward Moments in Parenting

"Hmm this is not the kind of mother-daughter bonding I was thinking of."

 

Hulk Bonds

Hulk Bonds

Barry Bonds tied and broke the home run record. Did he use steroids? That’s debatable...HULK SMASH!

 

756 mg

756 mg

Barry Bonds passed Hank Aaron last night. There is still no evidence that this should raise suspicion.

 

LiLo's $25,000 Bond

LiLo's $25,000 Bond

Lindsay was released early this morning on a $25,000 bond

 

Daddy's Little Helper

Daddy's Little Helper

Nothing says "Hallmark moment" like a little father-son bonding.

 

Weng Weng Rap

Weng Weng Rap

Weng Weng is Agent 00, the pint-sized Filipino James Bond. This rap not only celebrates him, it also cures cancer.

 

Tom Hanks is James Bond

Tom Hanks is James Bond

This movie trailer mash-up sets Tom Hanks as the world's greatest international spy!

 

Barry Bonds

Barry Bonds

That poor, poor athlete.

 

Whoose Boobs: Bond Girl Boobs

Whoose Boobs: Bond Girl Boobs

What's your name? "Boob, James Boob." What do you drink? A Boobtini. What kind of automobiles do you drive? Boobs.

 

Who'd You Rather: BOND, JAMES BOND!

Who'd You Rather:  BOND, JAMES BOND!

Who’d you rather let’s you make all the same choices Bond would. Like which girl to bang then never ever talk about again.

 

If Looks Could Kill

If Looks Could Kill

Doesn't this puppy kinda look like James Bond?

 

Who'd You Rather? Week 56: Bond Girls

Who'd You Rather? Week 56: Bond Girls

We show you two celebs and you tell us who you'd rather…you know! Compare your results with the rest of our visitors to see how your tastes match up.