I don't know what this means but it sounds both sexy and delicious!

If you can't say it with a greeting card, say it with a print-out banner outside your dorm.

…And here's a diagrammed image to prove it!

Our illustrator Joe-Zee recently did a movie he did with Eddie Murphy. Eddie was jealous that Joe-Zee looked so good in the fat-suit.

Obviously this is a novelty item, because the idea is that someone would walk into your bedroom and think, at first, that you and your heterosexual partner were lying there naked. ...Or it just might be for fat people that don't want to look gross when they're naked. Yeah.

This is some sort of product for the Nintendo DS. And if an old greasy man tries to give it to you from his creepy van, RUN! RUN AWAY!!!!

Kelly Brook looks good in a bikini. Just sayin'.

This is an infamous store in Maine. Their slogan is, "If we ain't got it, you don't need it." True dat.

Unfortunately for Rose, it looks like some crappy plastic surgery went afoul! She REALLY ain't got nothing on Dita Von Teese!

Paris like the beach. She also likes flashing her slash at the paparazzi! Thank god it's covered this time.

Some of Paris Hilton's possessions were auctioned off, including hundreds of very private photos and, journals, and video. Here she is pretending to be clean. LIAR!

The "Brief Safe" can secure your cash, documents, and other small valuables from inquisitive eyes and thieving hands, both at home and when you're traveling. These specially-designed briefs contain a fly-accessed 4" x 10" secret compartment with Velcro® closure and "special markings" on the lower rear portion. Even the most hardened burglar or most curious snoop will "skid" to a screeching halt as soon as they see them — wouldn't you?

He's the foxiest little double-agent on the planet! It's 00!

Jenna Jameson and Paris Hilton are pegged to host a new reality TV series that basically gets virgins laid. It's being made by the same guy that released the Paris Hilton sex tape, so you know it's gonna be classy.

Mena Suvari, the girl from American Beauty that DIDN'T have huge boobs, decided to got topless at the beach recently. But she put these Liquid Generation pasties on right before we took these photos.

Scientists have broken down the facts: Britney is a fug-monster.

I think she should just slap an eyepatch on that and get herself some pirate street-cred.

A girl gets tossed around like a ragdoll when her friends strap her into a human slingshot. AWESOME!

Get ready for all the mixed-up mashed-up fun when your favorite Disney Channel shows come together for Who’d You Rather !

There's pretty much no one in the world with a better body than Jessica Biel. I challenge you to find a hotter bod.