"America's Got Talent" but Germany's got the Hoff. We're obviously jealous as he had a starring role in the finale of the show.

Sienna Miller doesn't like America, and her itty bitty titties share those thoughts. Looking back, we couldn't find any pictures of her, in which she wasn't topless.

This week America’s sexiest swine offers up a batch of her favorite celebrity boobs.

This sexy vixen shows us the value of a well placed morning stretch. And how to hide an entire army of pies under your dunlap.

Tom & Katie boogied their butts off at the Beckhams "Welcome to America" party – apparently the chicken dance makes Tom sweat!

Soccer Star David Beckham and his hot Spice Wife have settled down state side. Who better to give them a proper American greeting than Philip Norris?

The Army's "Active Denial System" WILL MELT YOUR FACE!

Philip Norris celebrates America’s independence by saluting all the reasons we totally kick ass.

What happens on the Fourth of July when you pass out from too much America-toasting? Your jackass friends try to kill you with fireworks. Hooray for freedom!

The MTV Movie Awards always prompts some sort of gimmicky hi-jinx. Here's Jessica and Sarah pretending to go all "college-experimental" in front of America.

America's Next Top Stripper is more like it!

What would happen if America's Next Top Model did an American Apparel photoshoot with AA's creepy mustachioed founder, Dov Charney? Well someone might DIE.

America’s bald pop princess sings her heart out in our parody of Sinead O’Connor’s “Nothing Compares To You.”

Have you ever wondered what your nickname would be if you joined the Army? Well now you can when you take this quiz!

For the 17th edition of America's favorite music puzzle game, we give you an all name game, a game for which you will play until you have to go to the bathroom.

America's Next Top Model is already tops in my pants! Er, I mean book!

1967 - 2007. America's Princess. Never forget.

Did the Food Network slip in subliminal ads for McDonald's during Iron Chef America? Crazy!

This week America lays a President to rest, and that President is Gerald "Jheri Curl" Ford

When you crack open this piñata, little US Army men fall out! Let's inspect it for WMDs!