Slippy Jenkins Author Image

President Obama Orders LiquidGeneration to Save The Children

By: Slippy Jenkins
November 10 2009, 3:29 PM

 

Excuse the dust around here, and all the little bugs and mispellings you're bound to find on our little corner on the internet. We're going to try something a little different today.

As part of President Obama's push to make more American teens read, he personally reached out to LiquidGeneration* to provide some word-based entertainment for you. Sure, you'll still see our award winning** animations and games, but you'll also see Words. Lots of them, as ordered by the Commander In Chief of the United States of America. So if you don't like it, don't be mad because we'll just ask Obama to bomb you. For the children. Because he wants them to learn how to read, through us.

Thank you for reading,

LiquidGeneration

P.S. - If you see anything you love or hate, we'd like to know about it. Just leave a comment below, or if you really want to make me upset and cry like a little girl, just shoot me a personal email: slippy@liquidgeneration.com.

 

*no he didn't

**Awards, as in the cookies our mothers give us each time we make fun of Lindsay Lohan. They hate her because she's one of those "fast girls." Their words.

 

 

 

The Great American Boobventure

The Great American Boobventure

Columbus discovered America! You can discover whoose boobs these are!

 

Barbecuing Advice by The Spanish Fly

Barbecuing Advice by The Spanish Fly

LG’s resident sexologist is back with some barbequing advice for the summer! If you’re firing up the grill this weekend, you might want hear what The Spanish Fly has to say about the Great American Barbeque.

 

American Idol's Bikini Girl Is Hottish

American Idol's Bikini Girl Is Hottish

Yeah, Bikini Girl is hottish. She'd be just plain "hot" if we never saw her on American Idol and didn't know she was so stupid.

 

American Idol Hates Gays

American Idol Hates Gays

Philip Norris explains why Adam Lambert lost American Idol and why Americans hate the gays. Good Times!

 

Proof of Why America Is Awesome

Proof of Why America Is Awesome

Sometimes it just takes a picture to let you know why American is awesome.

 
 

The Worst Day of Their Young Lives

The Worst Day of Their Young Lives

Watch as these girls totally lose it over Dave Archuleta losing on American Idol. And by "lose it" I mean GO BANANAS.

 

Wimbledon Daily Hot: June 25th

Wimbledon Daily Hot: June 25th

Ashley Harkleroad was defeated in the first round 6-4, 6-3 by some French chick. Hairy armpits should never defeat Grade A American ass, this is will not be tolerated.

 

Kids Shooting Automatic Weapons

Kids Shooting Automatic Weapons

This is what Europeans picture when they think of the American family.

 

American Gladiator Girl Pass Out

American Gladiator Girl Pass Out

Apparently she wasn't aware this was an audition for a very serious athletic competition that involves cannon-propelled tennis balls.

 

As American as Apple Pie

As American as Apple Pie

Heidi and Spencer embody all of our hopes and dreams.

 

American Idol Is Finally Over!

American Idol Is Finally Over!

American Idol is finally over. Now I can get beck to my normal life of listening to non-crappy music.

 

American Idol Is Fake!

American Idol Is Fake!

Paula Abdul screwed up and now everybody knows that American Idol is fake!

 

John Daly Golfs Shirtless

John Daly Golfs Shirtless

The epitome of the American Dream in 2008.

 
 

David Archuleta's Giggly

David Archuleta's Giggly

American Idol's David Archuleta giggles like the most adorable child/bitch ever.

 

Giant Cheeseburger Challenge

Giant Cheeseburger Challenge

What's more American than a 222 lb. cheeseburger?

 

American Idol Punch Out

American Idol Punch Out

It's your turn to beat the crap out of those judges from American Idol.

 

Fantasia Burrito

Fantasia Burrito

American Idols should be thin and beautiful, not fat and radish haired. Boo Fantasia, boo.. And I don't mean the term of endearment.

 

OTHER COOL STUFF